Unconventional
by ImperialMoonBeing
Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? Fem!Sev More Inside AU SMUT!
1. The True Depth of a Relationship

**(A.N.) Gods soooooo busy I don't even know how the hell I even got this out! This more or less got inspired by VenusEvilOverlord's _Fancy A Snack? _****Hope ya'll enjoy!**

**Legal Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. :(**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year**

***Apologies for any spelling & grammatical errors (I'm doing this on my Ipad)***

"dialogue"

'thoughts'

* * *

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 1-****The True Depth of A Relationship**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

Serephina sighed. She absolutely hated Order meetings. A bunch of moronic imbeciles sprouting off useless observations and already known information. It was bloody annoying. Why did Albus want to have the damned meeting on a Friday? Couldn't the old man have waited until the weekend was over and not when it had just begun? Honestly.

And to top it all off, the majority of the meetings were held in Number 12 Grimmauld Place, just as tonight. Serephina hated this particular estate, or well more like the mutt that resided here.

Exhaling sharply through her nose, Serephina crossed her arms as Hestia Jones started giving her report. As more minutes ticked by, the more impatient Serephina got.

'For Merlin's sake woman, how long does it take to give a bloody report?' thought Serephina snarkily.

Five minutes after the clock striked seven, Serephina changed her impassive mask to a fierce glare directly pointed at Jones herself.

Catching site of the glare quickly, (because really, when Snape glares at you, you feel it) the blonde haired woman**(A.N. Not sure if that's true, but just go with it.)** hastily ended her tirade, as she deeply valued her life.

As most of the Order had left, Serephina stood up and grabbed her cloak that she had deposited on the chair she was sitting on for the duration of the meeting.

Before she could leave, however, she was overwhelmed by the force that was Mrs. Weasley.

"Serephina, won't you please stay with us for dinner? I made roast!," loudly procliamed Mrs. Weasley with a hopeful smile.

Serephina bit the inside of her cheek. Molly had always been respectful and she had Serephina's respect in return, as anyone who could put the fear of God in the Weasley twins deserved.

Serephina nodded once and was met with the beaming smile of one Molly Weasley.

"Wonderful! Go on and sit anywhere you want dear, it's about time I get some meat on those bones. Really, Serephina it's almost as if you forget to eat sometimes."

Serephina smiled a half-smile in her direction; she never starved herself on purpose, but she'd forget a meal here or there as she was balancing the grading work of a Professor, the making of Potions as a Master, and the tasks and meetings of a "loyal" Death Eater.

As she moved to take the closest seat, Serephina was roughly plowed into.

Serephina immediately glowered at the culprit.

"As you are not that old, one wouldn't expect your eyesight to be failing yet. Watch where you're going Black," Serephina said in her usual drawl, never missing a beat.

Before any response could be made, Serephina turned and sat herself down.

Everyone ignored Serephina as usual, with the exception of Mr. Potter, who greeted her before he went to sit down with the rest of the brats. She inclined her head in response.

Black ignored her, which was surprising as he was usual regarding her with disdain or rewarding her with a glare.

Dinner was a quiet affair for the adults, almost no conversation was made except between the Wolf and pink-haired metamorphagus.

The dining room was actually calm for once, with an almost tranquil atmosphere, which didn't match Serephina's racing heart as she clutched at the piece of parchment that was discreetly slipped into her hand.

* * *

When dinner was over, Serephina quickly excused herself and stepped into the corridor and walked to the sitting room, seating herself in one of the loveseats.

Taking a deep breath, she opened the folded parchment and was met with the elegant calligraphy that she hadn't seen in years.

_Seph_

_Please meet me in the library ten minutes after eveyone has finished with dinner. We need to talk. _

_~Siri_

Closing her eyes, Serephina tried to figure out what to do. Should she go? Why wasn't she crumpling the note and leaving? Why was she still here?

She sighed. She hadn't been called Seph in ages. Leaning back into the loveseat, she stared at the innocent looking note.

Casting a tempus and seeing it was half past seven, Serephina got up and crept stealthily into main corridor, watching for any other signs of life.

When she entered the library, Serephina went straight to a secluded corner that held a small chair side table and a comfortable leather loveseat. Picking out an interesting text, she climbed onto it and got comfortable.

So lost in the text, Serephina never noticed someone watching her with stormy grey eyes, until his presence was pronounced.

"You've always loved that chair."

Serephina looked up sharply. Opaque obsidian met smoky slate, before obsidian looked away and said," It's the most comfortable in the house."

Silence.

"What is it that you want to talk about Black," said Serephina suddenly.

A glint came into Srirus' eyes. "You know what."

Still glancing away, Serephina whispered "There's nothing to talk about."

Walking closer, Sirius replied "Then you wouldn't have come here."

Bringing her legs up, Serephina put her head down on her knees. She knew that was true. She really should have just gone back to her quarters, not home. She really didn't have a home anymore. Home was where everyone could relax and take off any masks. She hadn't had a home in over fifteen years.

Serephina stiffened as she felt an arm go around her sholders. Turning her head, she glared at Sir-Black. He looked back with soft eyes. Serephina felt herself being lifted and settled into a warm lap.

"What do I have to do so you can actually believe I am sorry Seph." Sirius gently whispered, laying his head over hers, taking in the sweet smell of Belladonna that always followed Seph.

Defenses up, Serephina striked. "How about actually apologized," she said, trying to keep the bitterness out of her voice.

"Well, maybe if you gave me a little insight I could apologize properly," said Sirius exasperated and trying to stay calm. He kept taking deep breaths.

Serephina felt the sleeves of her cloak, they were wet as were her eyes. She was crying she noted.

Slowing sitting and looking up, she gazed right up at Sirius, who flinched slightly at seeing her tear-shined eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?" she whispered. Sirirus didn't get a chance to reply as Serephina stood up and continued on.

"Why didn't you tell me you weren't the Potters' Secret Keeper! Gods, Siri I practically thought you were until you broke out!"

By the end, Serephina was all but shouting at the end of it, even as she sank to the floor crossing her legs again.

"But that's just it Seph, you practically thought! You and I both know that I never betrayed James and Lily, if you 'practically thought' you would have tried to get me out and prove my innocence!" said Sirius, whose voice was also rising.

Serephina snorted.

"What was I supposed to do? Technically I was and still am a marked Death Eater, who would have believed me? If it wasn't for Albus I would have been chucked into the cell right next to you and you know it!" She drawled almost sarcastically, glaring.

Sirius glared right back. "You shouldn't have been a Death Eater in the first place. I asked and pleaded with you not to, but you still disregarded me and went along and became a spy anyway! Do you think I like that you have to bow and grovel at his feet, that you're around creeps like Avery, Mulciber, and Sewlyn basically every other week, that you have to torture or kill just to stay in his good graces? Do you know how useless and disgusted with myself whenever you report to an Order meeting trembling so noticeably that the only thing in question is how long you were under? Gods, Seph!"

When his tirade was over, Sirius sank in front of Serephina, tilting her head up to meet his pleading gaze.

"Please don't go back Seph."

Sighing, Serephina replied softly, "You know I can't do that Siri, the Order needs a spy, and I'm the only strong enough Occlumens to block him out. Besides, even if Albus got another spy, he or she would have to start in the outer circles, it would take years to get into the Inner Circle, and it would never work if the spy wasn't 'Dark' enough. No, it's just better this way Siri, just leave it alone."

Sirius closed his eyes tightly. "Well, it shouldn't have to be this way."

Feeling small, soft hands caress his face, he opened his eyes to look directly into Seph's. "Well, unforetunately it is that way Siri, you can't change it." She offered a small, sad smile.

Sirius sighed. "Still wish I could."

Still gazing into Seph's eyes, he leaned forward until they were entangled together and their foreheads touhching.

"For the record, I am sorry, for everything." Serephina's eyes widened marginally. She cleared her throat. "For the record, I'm sorry, too."

Sirius grinned, feeling giddy as he felt Seph relax into his arms after they both apologized, they were far from healed, but they had finally began to heal.

He was even ecstatic enough to lean forward and kiss her.

Serephina Snape froze in place as she felt Sirius' lips on hers. She had expected him to embrace her or something, anything but that.

She also never expected to feel the butterflies in her stomach again either. As much as she tried, as much fight as she gave, Serephina was losing her control and they both knew it.

Sirius knew Serephina was stubborn, but hell he was, too.

Standing up, he lifted her up with him, and promptly shoved her petite, but lithe body into the nearest bookcase. Serephina gasped as she collided into th case and Sirius took this oppurtunity to slip his tongue into her mouth.

For the life of her, Serephina lost her control and brought her hands up to tangle in Sirius' hair, pulling trying to deepen the passionate kiss even more.

They pulled away several moments later, panting harshly with eyes shining.

The two couldn't go far, however, as the chains around each's neck were connected. **(A.N. Think Mulan 2) **

What they each saw made each lose their breath and made each chuckle.

Connected between them was each's hidden chain which held their wedding rings, which were entangled together just as the pair was a moment ago. Smiling brightly, Serephina unknotted the two rings.

Sirius couldn't muster anything else but a gentle voice.

"You kept it?"

Serephina met her husband's gaze. "It never left my person," she said cheeks slightly tinged pink.

Sirius grinned brightly.

Leaning back down, Sirius trailed down until both their lips were touching.

"I believe we were in the middle of something Mistress Black."

**WARNING! SMUT!**

**...**

**...**

**...**

**..**

**.**

"Hmmmm...didn't feel like we were Master Black, maybe you'll have to convince me," purred Serephina.

Sirius growled and captured Serephina's lips with his own. Wanting more leverage, he lifted her up, until she was flat against the side of the bookcase, with her legs wrapped around his waist.

When Sirius lifted her up, Serephina immediately wrapped her legs around his waist, softly moaning when he pressed up against her. Needing some sort of friction, Serephina arched into Sirius, instantly bucking right into his arousal.

Groaning, Sirius pushed himself away from his wife, who was looking at him in confusion. It wasn't helping the way she looked disheveled with her full lips that were red and swollen from the prior kisses.

Slightly panting, he managed to get out, "The library isn't the place for such activities."

At Seph's arched eyebrow he continued, carrying her out of the library and hurrying up the stairs, "No, bedroom activities belong in the bedroom."

At the end of the sentence they were at the entrance to the master bedroom, their bedroom.

There was no hesitation as Sirius all but tore the door from its hinges in his haste to get inside. Once they were, he carried Seph to the bed and gently layed her down as he put up privacy wards on the room and a strong silencing charm. Serephina sat up on her knees to pull Sirius back over to her, when Sirius flicked his wand at her.

At once her vision turned dark. "What the hell, Sirius?" she began, as she tried to pry the blindfold from her head. When she realised she couldn't, her hands sought out her husband as he was the one who put her in this position.

Strong hands grabbed her wrists. "Calm down Seph, we haven't been together in years, I don't wnat this to be quick, I want this to be about you."

Serephina stopped struggling. She had forgotten how Sirius could be when he was determined, warily she relaxed.

She felt Sirius undressing her the muggle way. Serephina reached up and unbuttoned his sirt, just because she couldn't see didn't mean she was an invalid.

When they were both naked, Sirius took his sweet time trying to rememorize Seph's body. By the time he worked back up to her neck, Seph was filled with frustration.

"Will you bloody get to it already," Serephina whined impatintly.

"Tut tut Seph, why do you insist on ruining that beautiful mouth of yours with such vulgar words," remarked Sirius as he was mouthing the line of her jaw, "When I could think of so many better things to do with it."

Serephina let out a moan when he took one of her breasts into his mouth. It had been a long while since they had done this obviously, but she had forgotten just how Slytherin Sirius could be in the bedroom. She hated and loved the way he gave up on his own pleasure just to torture her.

Tangling her hands into his hair, Seph arched up into Sirius moaning.

Releasing the soft mound, Sirius licked up to Serephina's ear. "Moan for me Seph, only for me."

By the end of the sentence, Sirius was pressing his hips forward to up into Serephina's center.

Serephina clutched at Sirius, her temporary blindness increasing her other senses. By the time Sirius fully sunk into her, Serephina was already absolutely completely wrecked. She didn't even try to muffle her moans, and she couldn't help it the way she lifted her hips higher, impatient and needy.

The first penetration was, in her mind, the best. No matter if she memorized every plane or dip on Sirius' body, it didn't take away those first initial feelings that could never be relived.

Sirius was hot and throbbing and Serephina felt stretched and stretched to the point of pain, amd utterly complete.

They both were quivering, both of them staving of the need to come. They hadn't had each other in so long and they were trying to make this moment last.

"Sirius, y-you're-," Serephina gasped, trying to keep her voice from wavering, but she was interuppted.

"-absolutley perfect, ambrosial, addicting, and stunningly beautiful and you feel bloody amazing."

Seph felt herself heat up, as she heard the unmistakeable awe in Sirius' voice.

After another still movement, Serephina couldn't control the urge, bucked her hips and demanded, "Move!"

Sirius nodded almost frantically as he dragged his hands down to grip Seph's hips just as she sunk her fingers into his hair.

He pulled out completely, which she couldn't help but whine at, before roughly shoving back in.

Seph's toes curled as he set up a steady pace," Si-siri."

The dog animagus growled as he heard Seph's drawn out moan. His thrusted harder and deeper, forcing Serephina's body into the pliant bed.

The blindfold made Serephina hyper aware of everything. Every thrust, every touch, every kiss...

Their lips connected and Serephina felt lightheaded.

"You should see yourself right now," Sirius breathed just before he attacked Serephina's neck. And Serephina moaned, absolutely not minding that there would more than likely be a purplish mark there tomorrow.

Sirius' desperation was evidient in his every move. With the blindfold on, all Serephina could focus on was the pleasure that was filling her up from her to toe. They were both panting and Seph could hear the crude sounds of their sex- of Sirius' balls slapping against her arse with every hard thrust.

Serephina wrapped her arms and legs even more tightly around him. She felt sweat dripping down her brow and her stomach was tight with tension.

"A-are you c-close?" Sirius managed to get out.

Seph nodded to far gone to be able to voice anything anymore. She wanted this to last forever, to be locked in this embrace for eternity, wanted to live in the moment until she got sick of it. She didnt think she ever would.

The moment Sirius lifted her hips higher, she was gone. Her orgasm tore through her with an intensity like no other.

She vaguely heard Sirius cursing as he released inside of her, still throbbing.

As Sirius came, he harshly closed his mouth over Serephina's, his essence scorching hot filling her up completely.

**End of Rated Scene**

**.**

**..**

**...**

**...**

**...**

Serephina's heart was still racing, even as Sirius turned them over and she laid her head on his chest, gulping in as much air as she could.

Serephina vaguely felt Sirius remove the blindfold, but she didn't open her eyes yet.

Her entire body was lax and it was undeniably perfect.

She opened her eyes, only to find Sirius staring right at her with his intense gaze. It traveled down, stopping when caught sight of the ring around her neck. Unclasping the chain, he took the ring off, took Serephina's left hand and kissed all the fingers, before slipping it on her ring finger. It fit perfectly.

"I love you."

He whispered.

She smiled softly. "I love you, too." Serephina said hoarsely, her throat raw.

Sirius just gave her a smug, knowing smirk.

Seph only answered to that was an answering smack.

* * *

**(A.N.) So whatcha think? Please R&R!**

**Oh yeah and Serephina is pronounced 'Serafina', and Seph is pronounced 'Sef'**


	2. I Hate Gingers in the Morning

**(A.N.) Well I'm glad you like! I checked my email this morning, and suddenly I find all these alerts and favorites for this story! I'm flattered guys this has been up for like a day guys and it's already on a favorites list. I give my most humbled thanks. *bow***

**I would also like to thank rain ravinlin, and Annabeth Volturi for reviewing. This chapter is for you guys (or girls XD) hope you like!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, that belongs to Miss Rowling.**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year**

***Apologies in advance for errors! If I use the wrong pronoun, its cuz I'm Filipino, so its not my fault! ^_^***

"dialogue"

'thoughts'

* * *

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 2- I Hate Gingers in the Morning**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

Bright sunlight poured into silk curtained, clear crystal windows on the light Saturday morning. Inside the master bedroom of Number 12 Grrimmauld Place, a pair of sleepy, deep, grey eyes opened slowly in mild confusion.

Sirius Black blinked owlishly, still in puzzlement, until a smooth female arm reached from the heap of blankets and wrapped itself around him. It was followed closely by a head with a mane of long, bedraggled, ebony tresses, that snuggled itself deeper into his chest.

He heard the blissful sigh of exhaustion, before he felt the body against his go lax, breaths evening out again. Eyes widened in realization as the recollections of yesterday flooded through Sirius' mind. After a few still shocked moments, Sirius felt the warm feeling of utter contentment wash over him, as he tightened his grip on his wife's waist.

He grinned and briefly lowered his head to give Seph a chaste kiss on the forehead. She didn't even stir.

It had been so long since he had held her in his arms; years it had been since he had saw her without any masks in place.

They were married on July 15, 1977, about a month after graduation. They hadn't really cared for a wedding, just a ceremony. There were only two witnesses to make their marriage official, Regulus Black and Poppy Pomfrey. Regulus was going to spy as just as Serephina in the Dark Lord's ranks, and Poppy, besides being the Hogwarts mediwitch, had always been a close confidant, and had also been a friend of Serephina's mother.

The frist several months was lived on a marital high. They traveled to the English coutryside on his motorbike, just the two of them. They would take trips into the muggle world as they were to recognizable in the Wizarding. They were open and could talk about anything, and it was comfortable.

Then reality hit them right in the face.

Soon, Seph got called in more for Death Eater meetings, and he with Order meetings. There wre raids and bloodshed, and more than once had Seph returned trembling terribly and sobbing. He begged and pleaded and shouted at her to stop going back, but she always did.

By the time they were nineteen and holding two yeas of marriage, a rift of mistrust was forming between them. Sirius was out being a Auror and reporting to the Order, just as she was reporting to the Dark Lord and then back over to Dumbledore. Besides the whole spying business, Seph wanted her Mastery in Potions. Gone most of the time for something or another, the weren't as close anymore.

Then Seph was at the Hoghead when Trewalany gave Dumbledore the prophecy. Seph was the only one to hear it, but she wasn't alone that day. Avery and Parkinson were in the bar, and once they knew Serephina had heard, she knew she had to tell the Dark Lord of it, well part of it.

She had told him of it, and he had grinned and said that there was finally more hope that 'Moldyshorts was finally going to get his arse kicked.' She just rolled her eyes.

They grew closer again, and then Lily and James announced they were pregnant and that the baby was to be born at the end of July.

The rift came back, stronger than ever, and Dumbledore requested that Lily and James take baby Harry into hiding. Sirius talked to the three of them and decided that he was the Seceret- Keeper, well the known 'Secret - Keeper.'

He had told Seph that he was the Secret -Keeper because he knew she woud believe him, and would have to report somethingback. He suggested the actual Secret-Keeper be Wormtail, a friend that would never betray them. Or so everyone thought.

Seph told the Dark Lord the ruse, but Wormtail had already reported that he was the actual one and that Sirius Black was just a faux.

Besides his distrust in Seph, his distrust in Moony also grew. When Dumbledore suspected there was a spy in the Order, Sirius was ashamed his first suspect was Moony. He knew he was a Werewolf, and that werewolves were Dark creatures, most of them had joined with the Dark Lord because of this.

Tenions were high and on Halloween of '81 the Dark Lord attacked the Potter household. He had a bad feeling that day. Seph hadn't returned home yet, and he jsut had the most awful feeling that something was going to happen. Disbelieving anything would, he still took his motorbike and flew to the Potters'. He was glad he did.

When he saw the mess of the blown-up house Sirius felt such a burning rage inside of him that threatened to burst. He stopped it in the hope that anyone, especially Harry, was still alive in the wreckage. He searched and searched and finally heard a cry.

Heart doing multiple palpatations, he found his beloved godson. He had given Harry and his motorbike to Hagrid, as he said that he was going to take Harry to Dumbledore.

Knowing that his godson was going to be safe, he went to find the little rat of a traitor.

Everything happend so fast.

Suddenly he's chasing Pettigrew, and then Pettigrew is crying in the middle of the street, accusing him of killing the Potters', and he knows on the inside he's right becasue he's the one who suggested him as the Secret- Keeper in the frst place. Then the street in blown-up, Pettigrew's finger is cut off, and Aurors are taking him in for a trial, which wasn't really a trial at all, and he's chucked into Azkaban. You know the rest from there.

Sirius sighed. So much distrust in what was supposed to be his family.

Serephina was already sarcastic, but she wasn't bitter or that cold. His brother Regulus, used to be alive. His mother used to actually love him, believe it or not. She had known Eileen Prince growing up and was the one to introduce him to Seph in the library, all those years ago. She had reintroduced him to the Black family after they had married and resorted to now scream at him from her potrait how unwelcome he was in this house seeing Serephina be not welcomed or wanted at all here, the place tha twas supposed to be her home. Poppy never looked at him with such a furious, desperate look saying 'Fix this! Fix _her_!'

He's never felt so useless.

'Well no need to dwell on the past' thought Sirius. 'What's done is done and I can't change it.'

Focusing back onto Seph, he smiled a tad bit wolfishly as he traced the smooth contours of her face. The pads of his fingers lightly traced over Seph's full rose lips, still slightly swollen from their -ahem- 'activities'.

Sirius was so enraptured with her features, that he didn't realise she had awoken until it was too late.

"Stop staring at me, you pervert."

Sirius felt himself flush in embarrassment at being caught. "I-I wasn't-it how did y-you-"

"You _were_...you do that time we wake up together."

A smile slowly made itself onto Serephina's face as she opened her eyes, looking up at him. Sirius stared right back at her, their gazes locking.

Obsidian met grey and they smiled tentative smiles, that held the promise of the renewed 'eternity'.

Closing her eyes again, Serephina nuzzled closer into the crook of Sirius' neck, their legs intertwining beneath the covers. Sirius placed a chaste kiss on her cheek. "Hmmmm...Seph..."

Serephina snuggled closer. "Hmmmm..."

Sirius stared intently at his wife, "Shower?"

"Hmmm...okay." She sighed, not even bothering to move.

Sirius rolled his eyes and slowly sat up, swinging his legs to the edge of the bed, taking Seph with him. He stood up, carrying her bridal style, to his bathroom, pausing to grab his wand and two fluffly white towels.

He flicked his wand and the towels flew over to two silver hooks, while the shower turned on, spraying rain like droplets over the shower tiles. Sirius carried Seph all the way until they were under the spray.

Serephina sighed and leaned closer as the water trailed over her.

Sirius took his time washing the both of them, enjoying the feel of Seph so lax against him again.

When he was done, he flicked his wrist and the spray stopped, the towels floating towards them. He gave one to Seph, who took it with a small smile, wrapping it around herself, as he wrapped his around his waist.

As they walked back into the main room, Sirius asked, "Do you have any extra clothes?" Hoping she didn't.

"Ummm..."

However, before she could answer the door of the room suddenly burst open, a few bodies rushing in and stopping dead in their tracks.

"Hey, Sirius Mrs. Weasley said it's time for bre..."

"OH, SIRIUS! Mom has so -"

"-graciously requested your presence-"

"-for brea-..."

Silence.

Then all three voices in complete sync. "Professor Snape? What are you doing _here_?"

Serephina glared at the red-headed twins and dumb-struck Boy-Who-Lived. "Well, before you dunderheads came crashing into the room, I was just about to dress." She said in her signature scathing tone.

That's when all three boys realised that the only thing covering their still slightly wet Potions professor was a towel. Harry blushed and turned away, while the twins eyes practically bulged out of their sockets.

"Damn Professor, _this _is what has been-"

"-hiding under all of those teaching robes?"

Well that statement was true. Years of being a spy and her own health regiment, had toned Serephina Snape's body. While still unhealthily pale, there was no denying her fitness.

Harry being the smart one here tried to get the twins out of the room, still averting his eyes, but to no such luck. Serephina, who hated unproductiveness, grabbed the closest clothes- her underwear, a pair of Sirius' boxers, and the simple grey shirt he was wearing last night, and headed towards the bathroom.

"Damn Professor!-"

"Is that why-"

"-you billow your robes-"

"-all scarily?"

"To hide that-"

"-gigantic backseat?"

Serephina just rolled her eyes and slammed the bathroom door closed.

"Guys, stop teasing Professor Snape, she finds that annoying in the morning." said Sirius, who used the twins distraction to change in the walk-in closet. He was wearing simple dark blue jeans and a white T-shirt, with his hair pulled back in a loose ponytail.

"Speaking of which," began Harry,"What_ is_ Professor Snape doing in your rooms anyway Sirius?"

The twins gave Sirius sly grins.

"Sirius-"

"-you dog,"

"-literally"

"-and figuratively."

Sirius just responded by smacking the twins upside the head. "Go on you two, breakfast is downstairs."

With a mischievious look shared between them, the twins said together, "Will Professor Snape be joining us?" They asked innocently.

"Yes, I will", answered Serephina, who came out of the bathroom dressed in the attire she grabbed.

"And I will see you boys there, alive hopefully, when you get out of this room." She finished, with a vindictive smirk, wand in hand.

They paled and ran just as fast out of the room as they had entered.

Sirius and Serephina glanced at each other quickly, then back to a still there Harry, whose arms were crossed and eyebrows almost touching his hairline.

"As there is much to be explained-" started Serephina. "We'll talk later kid, promise." Interuppted Sirius.

Harry smirked. "I can think of many explanations Professor, but I just want to see everyone's reactions at breakfast."

Sirius shoved him lightly on the sholder. "Get out of here kid, we'll be out in a moment."

Grinning at both of them, to the surprise of Serephina, Harry exited the room, humming to himself.

Sirius shook his head at his godson's antics, and turned to observe his wife. He quirked an eyebrow when he saw her wearing his clothes. 'Not that I have a problem with it', he thought. Seph just huffed and took his left hand with her right. She stopped when she felt something between her fingers and pulled Sirius' hand up to investigate.

On his ring fnger, sat his wedding ring. Serephina blinked and looked up at her taller (damn him!) husband.

"Breakfast?" she asked with an uncharacteristically breathless voice.

"Breakfast." he agreed, leading her down the stairs.

* * *

**(A.N.) Whew! Caught by the troublemakers! I'd would have probably never been able to keep my kool like that! Gimmie your thoughts on the story, please R&R!**


	3. Presenting: Mr & Mrs BlaWHAT?

**(A.N.) Another chapter! Whoo! Enjoy!**

**Anon- your words flatter me *bow* hope you enjoy this chapter as I tried my best to get it out today as I got inspired by your kind words.**

**Annabeth Volturi- don't worry, I know where this story is going and there WILL be someone who objects about them, I'm just thinking of how to write it.**

**BarbarafromGR- don't worry I'll keep writing, thanx for the support!**

**Kitana- I'll try to put as much pervy Weasley twins and smarty Harry as I can for you! **

**Rain Ravinlin- Thanks for reviewing! You were the first one! Feel special!**

**So, this chapter is for you guy, hope ya'll like!**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own Harry Potter. :(**

***Excuse the errors please, doing this on my Ipad, as my computer is down!***

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year**

* * *

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 3- Presenting: Mr. & Mrs. Bla-WHAT?**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

When Serephina and Sirius walked into the kitchen, they immediately saw Harry off to the side of the twins, all three smirking and looking even more excited as they entered.

The youngest Weasleys caught sight of their feared Potions professor, dropped their forks, and openly gaped. Hermione, though not any less surprised then they, had more tact and kept her mouth shut.

"Serephina, dear, what are you doing here?" asked a flabbergasted Mrs. Weasley, putting down an extra plate in front of the place she had just sat.

"Eating, Molly," replied Serephina without missing a beat. The twins and Harry were snickering into their palms as Sirius snorted.

"Yes, yes, but what are you doing _here_, dear? You don't usually stay the night or even drop by for breakfast for that matter." said Mrs. Weasley in slight exasperation.

After swallowing the bit of food she was chewing, Serephina said in the boredest tone possible,"Reacquainting myself."

Harry and the twins snorted and one of them coughed out something that suspiciously sounded like 'yeah, with Sirius.'

Remus spit out his coffee when he heard that comment with his enhanced Werewolf senses; he spelled away the mess. He looked at his best friend and the Potions Master who were sitting awfully close together and smirking. He let out a groan as he took in Serephina's apparel, well technically Sirius'. "What did you guys do?"

"Don't ask the question if you can't handle the answer Wolf(Moony)," said Sirius and Serephina together. Harry had to smack the twins on the back to keep them from choking.

Remus' and Arthur's eyes widened in realization. Hermione blushed all the way to her roots as she was following the conversation. Ginny just grinned at the response. Ron was still just the only one confused, and Molly just looked delighted at this new developement.

"So does that mean you'll be here to talk more often Serephina, dear?" asked Molly, delighted at the prospect at having another older woman to be able to talk to.

Harry smirked and answered before anyone else could. "Oh, don't worry Mrs. Weasley, I'm pretty sure Professor Snape will be here more often, just not to talk." The twins almost fell out of their seats, laughing. Sirius, Remus and Ginny were grinning, and Hermione blushed even deeper. Serephina, impassive as ever, just quirked an eyebrow at Harry, who just grinned and shrugged.

"Then what would you be doing here, dear?" asked Molly, still confused as was her youngest son.

Serephina snorted. "Sirius."

The twins literally fell out of their seats at this. They managed to get this out in between gasps though.

"We absolutely-"

"-love you Professor"

"-why aren't you"

"-this awesome"

"-in class?"

"Because if I was, all of you dunderheads would never leave." Serephina said, taking a sip of coffee from Sirius' mug.

"Hey, that's mine!" protested Sirius. Ron waited on the edge of his seat for the explosion. It never came.

Serephina looked at Sirius with the most angelic expression. Everyone looked stunned that the most devilish person could pull it off.

"Siri...what's mine is mine and what's your's is mine too, remember?" Serephina said as she used a voice one would talk to a three year old too. Sirius rolled his eyes. "That's irrelave-"

"What the bloody hell is going on here?" shouted Ron, turning red as he was angry he was being kept out of the loop. "Why is Sirius being nice to Snape? I thought they hated each other?"

"Ronald!" chatised Molly. "Sorry Mum, but really."

Before Molly could start a tirade on something, Sirius cleared his throat as Serephina sat amused, still eating her breakfast.

"Ron, first of all I don't hate your professor, and remember it is _Professor_ Snape-" Sirius started.

"Is that some kink of yours?" asked Serephina with a quirked eyebrow. "Shall you be my errant school boy?" she added as she pinched his cheek. (on the face guys ;D)

Remus spit out his coffee again. This time Harry joined the twins on the floor. Hermione amd Ginny gaped at their Potions professor's audacity. Molly was blushing as was Ron, who finally figured out what this was about. Arthur just continued to read the paper, pretending that this was a normal morning.

"I -I -you-WHAT?" splutterred Sirius who was turning slightly pink.

Serephina just shook her head, a small smile on her lips.

It was like time froze. No one had ever seen Professor Snape smile an actual smile before. Besides that, her hair was down, and it seemed to fall perfectly into place as she shook her head. Everyone, even Sirius held their breath, Serephina Snape looked stunning in that single moment, without any makeup (not that she wore any) or masks that hid her true self from the world.

After that very long second, before Ron could say anything, Ginny stood up on her chair and demanded some answers.

"Everybody shut up! Now I don't know about you Ron...or Hermione, but I want to find out what the heck's been going on."

Unforetunately, no one listened to her.

"That's what I've been trying to do Gin." "Ginny! Ginerva, get off the furniture!" "Don't worry-" "-Ickle Gin-Gin" "-we'll tell" "-you everything" "-later."

Sirius looked at Seph. "Teacher voice?"

Serephina stood up straight-backed at her full intimidating height of five foot four. "All of you cease this nonsensical gibbering immediately." She said in her usual loud drawling voice that demanded respect.

All of the children squeaked and put their hands up very conspicuously into the air. (noooo, Chris Brown's Turn Up the Music wasn't playing, they aren't that conceited XP)

Serephina sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose with her left hand. "Now if everyone could all just sit down-"

"Are you _married,_ Professor." asked a stunned Boy Wonder as he observed the silver wedding band that was so evidently rested upon her finger. Serephina and Sirius froze.

Silence.

"What? Snape's not married Harry! I mean who in their right mind would marry-" Ron gulped and went silent as he was on the end of a very deadly glare, and no it wasn't Molly's, nor Serephina's.

"Ronald! Apologize to-"

"That would be me, Ron." Sirius cut in, in a very serious tone.

Remus, who thought everything was going to be calmly explained now, took a sip of his now cooled down coffee, and promptly spit back out...again. "You're WHAT?" "No way!" "Siriusly?"

Serephina rolled her eyes at the latter. "Yes, believe or not, we're married." She said in her trademarked bored voice, trying to mask the growing nervousness.

"But-but-but, Sirius she's a D-Death Eater!" practically yelled Ron as he doubted to believe one of the most hated Professors was married to an amazing guy like Sirius.

Sirius' face darkened considerably. "I know, but she's a spy for the Order." He said, trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice. Harry and Remus were the only ones who noticed. Sirius rolled his eyes. "No, Hermione it wasn't an arranged marriage, I really do love your Potions professor no matter how much of a prude she is." Harry and Remus smiled softly at each other at the happy tone Sirius said that in, he deserved all the happiness he could get after Azkaban. Ron paled considerably when Sirius said the word 'love'.

"OW! Seph! You bitch, that hurt!" Sirius whined as he got a smile and a smack from his last comment. "Sirius! Language." "Sorry, Molly."

"Alright", said Molly, looking at Serephina and Sirius wit her hands on her hips, "Why haven't we been invited to your wedding,and how long have you been married? I swear to Merlin if you two say only a few hours..." trailed off Molly threathningly.

Seph and Sirius gazed at each other, silently communicating with their eyes, that no, they couldn't get out of this easily. Molly and Arthur looked to each other, they knew how long it took them to be able to communicate like this, years. Just how long have these two been together?

When a decision was made seconds later, Sirius cleared his throat. Everyone's eyes were on him and Serephina.

"We've been married for um...*ahem* eighteen years."

Silence.

Harry's eyes were as wide as saucers. Molly, Arthur, Remus, Hermione and basically everyone in the kitchen were slack-jawed with obvious shock.

"It would do all of you well to close your mouths, wouldn't want some sort of potion to fall inside of them", Serephina sneered, it was way too early in the morning to be putting up with these high-leveled dunderheads. Immediately, the lot of mouths closed shut with an audible snap.

Ron looked back and forth from Sirius and Serephina, trying to find any signs that this was just some sick joke, but found none as Sirius went up behind the Professor and wrapped his arms around his waist. "No way! It-it-it's not possible! I mean Sirius and Professor Snape?" hysterically said Ron.

Serephina winced slightly and turned away. Sirius' only response was just to hold her closer and placed a comforting kiss on her cheek, that had she been anyone else, would have them blushing as red as the strawberries laid on the table.

"Why didn't you tell us, Sirius?", Remus' soft voice rang out. "You were married for eighteen years, Sirius, eighteen years! I can see why Serephina didn't want to tell us, but why didn't you? This could have changed everything!"

"And how would have Potter reacted Wolf?" came out Serephina's biting response. "He absolutely loathed me."

"Yeah, well until about an hour ago I would have said Sirius hated you too", was Remus' calm reply. Serephina sighed, that was true.

"I do hate her Moony, no one should be allowed to have this amount of control over me", said Sirius playfully, trying to lighten the tense atmosphere.

"So when did you guys get together?" asked Harry, interested in the revealed events of today.

Sirius sat them both down, not even bothering to take Seph out of his lap to the amusement of most. He reached for his mug just as Seph finished the rest of her breakfast. "Fifth year."

Realization hit Remus like lightning. "That's why you were so furious sixth year!" (1)

There was a shadow over Sirius' face. "Yeah."

Everyone looked on in confusion. Sirius caught Harry's eye and mouthed 'later'. He nodded.

The twins looked at them with curiousity. "How do you manage your marriage if you two do is fight?" Sirius and Serephina smirked. "That is a good question, how are you two still together?" inquired Arthur, just as curious as his sons.

"We fight." They answered together.

"Really? We haven't noticed," said Harry grinning. "Wait, let me get this straight, the only real thing keeping you together, is quarreling with each other," asked a confused Hermione, trying to find something in common with the couple in question. "Mmmhmmm."

"Well, why do you guys fight?" tentatively asked Ginny, not sure of why Sirius and Professor Snape fight in the first place.

"Because its fun," said Sirius grinning. "It's actually how we got together."

Everyone turned to Serephina. She nodded. "Yes, this prat decided to corner me alone and tried to due me, its not my fault he lost, oh wait, it was." She said, turning to make a mocking face at Sirius at the end. He just proceeded to stick out his tongue at her.

"Do you get tired of that?" asked Hermione. "The fighting?"

"Honestly, Miss Granger, no," said Serephina, leaning onto her husband. Hermione still looked on confused. Serephina shrugged. (i know, shocker) "I'll admit Miss Granger, our relationship isn't what one would think it is. One minute we're in love, the next we can barely stand the other. It's a love/hate relationship."

"Now isn't-"

"-that the"

"-truth." added the twins, with smiles on their faces.

"I still don't get it! How can you two have a relationship, when most of it is filled hate?" persisted Hermione still, with her illusions of perfect couples.

"Miss Granger, I do hate my husband," here she held up a finger to stop what was going to be another tirade of questions. "But unlike some people I use my own tension filled hate to fuel more productive activities." Sirius and Serephina smirked. The twins and Harry couldn't help laughing at this. Remus just rolled his eyes. Hermione blushed again.

All in all, a normal morning.

* * *

**(A.N.) (1) The Whomping Willow incident when Serephina almost goes inside and almost gets mauled by Moony still happens. I'm just changing it up, that James was the one to tell Serephina to go to the Whomping Willow, trying to catch proof of Moony. That's why Sirius was so insane mad, cuz 1. That's his girl 2. Even though James came back to save her cuz he 'grew' up, Seph still owes him a life debt even though he was the one to put her in danger in the first place and 3. I'm going to make it that Seph got a scar and/or wound from that event.**

**Happy reading! Please review! Constructive criticism welcomed. **


	4. Intelligent Conversations Involving Aunt

**(A.N.) I'm so sorry for the wait! So much stuff has been happening and school is almost over so the teachers just keep cramming homework, tests, and projects. Sorry, I know you don't want to hear my excuses or whining, so here's your awaited chapter.**

**Annabeth Volturi - Oh. . I can see Serephina as Selene too! Have ya seen the latest Underworld? Was awesome!**

**BarbarafromGR - Thank u! And no I don't have a beta and honestly for this story or probably any of stories will I have one. It's not cuz I don't want one it's just that my updates are sporadic and I sometimes procrastinate, severely. So, I don't really think it would be fair to that beta...do ya get me?**

**CherryBlossom713- That's so sweet thank u! It really made my day when I read ur review! **

**Anon- Again my thanks! And that part was my favorite too! XP**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter...Draco might though ;)**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year.**

**Oh, yeah, and this takes place during Harry's 5th year Easter Break, so the kids and Serephina don't have to attend school til about a week. **

***Sorry for any errors, if they are that bad please tell me and I'll fix ASAP. Thnx!***

* * *

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 4 - Intelligent Conversations Involving Aunts/Frozen Gingers pt. 1**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

When breakfast was over, and before Molly could get up and assemble all the tainted dishes, Serephina spelled them all to the sink, which marginally broadened and immediately began to wash the ceramics.

Everybody was in awe. "How did you do that, dear?" asked Molly, surprised.

"With a flick of my wand," answered Serephina, confused, the same expression on everyone's face as they gazed at her. Sirius gave Molly a half-smile.

"The house only gives into the demands of the family, Molly. If the house doesn't recognize you as a Black, it will not respond to your demands," said Sirius. Hermione's eyes widened at the implications, despite everything revealed several minutes prior.

Molly glared at Sirius. "Then why didn't you just have the dishes clean themselves when you saw me doing them?"

Sirius winced. "Because even though my mother is dead, she can still control certain aspects of the house, ever since..." he tailed off, signaling at Seph, "Mother has taken away my house rights."

Serephina turned to Sirius, eyes wider than usual. "Has she really?" she asked.

"Oh, definitely, you know my mother loves you more than me, Seph," said Sirius, semi-serious.

"Good," she blinked, "You should do everything the muggle way."

"What? Why?"

"So you won't turn lazy and outrageously obese as some of my students are starting to be," Serephina sniffed, deadpanned.  
"Professor, we-"

"-aren't outrageously"

"-obese as you"

"-claim us"

"-to be!"

Serephina quirked an eyebrow. "No, but you fall into the other category of my students, the nuisances."

The twins took on a hurt and offended expression. "Professor, you cut us, deep!" they said together as they wiped fake tears.

Serephina's eyebrow was still quirked. "Why would I want to cut you? Then I would have to clean your blood stains off of my floor and hide your bodies. That's to much effort on my part," she said in a 'duh' tone. Sirius snorted by the doorway.

"Professor!"

By then it was only the twins, the trio and Serephina and Sirius in the kitchen. Harry looked at his godfather with an inquiring expression. He nodded and turned to Seph, who was glaring at the Weasley twins that had just ran out the door.

"Seph," he said, getting her attention,"It's later." He gestured his eyes at Harry. She blinked in response, heading towards the door. Before she walked out of it she realised she was the only one walking. "Well, are you two dunderheads going to stay there like fools or are we going to have one of those enlightening, _intelligent_ conversations?"

Harry complied right away and was quickly behind Serephina, Sirius just sneered, she just sneered back and turned, leading the way to the master bedroom, their room.

When they entered, Serephina quickly spelled away any remaining mess, and sat down on the bed, leaning against the headboard. Sirius sat next to Harry at the foot of the bed.

After a few moments of silence, Serephina broke it with "So, what are you curious about?" she said glancing at Harry. He looked deep in thought the last few minutes.

"What happend in your 6th year for Moony to be all shocked like that?" asked Harry after some consideration on the last hour's revelation.

Serephina sighed shakily as a dark look came onto Sirius' face. Harry glanced warily between the two of them. Serephina took in a deep, relaxing breath, trying to find the couage to retell the events from that year. She bit her bottom lip and looked to Sirius to begin. He audibly swallowed before turning to Harry.

"That year your father and I almost stopped being friends-hell almost stopped talking to each other." Sirius said, voice having a slight tremor. Harry's eyes were wide in shock. "But I thought that you and dad were best friends?" he asked confused. "What happend?"

H"I happend." said Serephina, almost derisively.

Harry tilted his head. "But I thought you guys said that my dad didn't know about you guys?"

"He didn't," said Serephina, eyes and thoughts far away. She met Harry's eyes and signaled for him to not interuppt.

"It was a fairly nice day, and was suppost to be a clear night. Even though your father matured a little, he still did anything that would annoy, pester, or intrigue me." Harry looked on confused at the latter. Seeing his look, Serephina explained. "Trick me into a trap. Of course, as you know I was and still am a Slytherin, and I usually didn't bother or got someone else to look into it. One day though..." she trailed off.

Harry's eyes widened in realization. "You fell for it."

Serephina nodded, wrapping her arms around herself. "It was almost the end of 6th year, and I was to take the Dark Mark that summer." She glanced back at Harry. "I've always spied for the Light since the beginning, and I was worried that I'd get found out. I got so caught up, that I didn't see through your father and I had forgotten to keep track of the lunar calendar."

Harry's eyebrows furrowed. The lunar calendar? What did that have to do with anything? Observing his godson's puzzlement, Sirius continued.

"Your father,um I guess you could say lured Seph to the Shrieking Shack and as you know you have to go to the Whomping Willow to get there." Harry nodded his understanding.

"Well, by the time she got there it was night and...there was a full moon."

Harry gazed at his Potions Professor who was paler than normal with her eyes closed, he looked back at his godfather in fearful shock. "Oh, Merlin." He said, thoughts immediately going to Moony.

Being the Gryffindor he was, Harry continued on. "So, what happend," he whispered. It was so silent in the room, that it echoed as a shout.

Serephina took a much needed breath and opened her eyes; they looked far away in memory. Taking one more and pushing the recollections behind her Occlumency shields, she began.

"As you know, I had gotten fooled by your father, which I admit was pretty foolish on my part. It was almost the end of term and I was going to receive the Dark Mark that summer. I was scared out my wits, thinking what would happen if the Dark Lord found me out and as was said hadn't kept track of the lunar calendar. "

Breathing in her nose and out of her mouth, Serephina tried to relax.

"Your father told me that if I wanted to find out about what was making those sounds in the Shrieking Shack, then to go down to the Whomping Willow after curfew. I already knew that Lupin was a Werewolf, but I didn't know he was making all those noises in the Shack. In my state of worry for the summer, I foolishly went to check it out."

Serephina looked at Sirius. "Your godfather wasn't there yet."

Sirius, keeping his gaze down, said," I had gotten detention with McGonagall that day and was left behind to catch up."

Serephina shivered and Sirius went over to her and pulled her into his arms. Harry just looked worriedly on.

Taking a breath, Serephina continued. "I went to the Whomping Willow and was just about to put the branch inside the slot, when your father called my name. I had dodged all the branches at this point, but that was enough for the tree to strike me. " Sirius had a tortured look in his eyes. Harry could tell he didn't want to continue on this subject and left it alone.

"I, of course, ended up in the Hospital Wing, your father had gotten me there, I owed him a life debt, which is now transferred to you." She ended in a whisper.

Harry looked absolutely horrified. "Is there any other way to pay a life debt?"

Serephina smiled sadly. "I'm afraid not Mr. Potter."

Harry perked up. "Harry." he said quietly. "Pardon?" asked Serephina. It was Harry's turn to smile. "Call me Harry, Professor. I mean, uh well, you are married to my godfather so, uh, that makes you my Aunt?" He ended in a question, ears tinged pink.

Serephina opened her mouth to answer, but it wasn't her voice that answered. "Yup! You can call her Seph!" Sirius said, trying to get back in good spirits. Serephina glared at her husband for interrupting her.

"Aunt Seph...I kinda like it." Said Harry shyly. Serephina huffed. "Fine! But only cause you said Aunt," she said, exasperated with the two boys.

Godfather and godson grinned at each other. Serephina just rolled her eyes. They talked for the rest of the day, all until Molly called for 'Dinner!'. By the time they went down to the kitchen, Harry had been addressing Serephina 'Aunt' so naturally, that one wouldn't have expected he had just started calling her that today.

* * *

Again Sirius and Serephina entered the kitchen, this time with Harry in tow. Serephina was smirking while Harry was covering his mouth with his palm trying to contain his laughter. Sirius just looked absolutely mortified. "Why did you tell him that?" He demanded, still in embarrassment.

Before Serephina had a chance to answer, loud cries were heard. "Harrikinns!" "Where have you been, Harry?" Everyone looked on in shock as they saw the Boy-Who-Lived walk in beside the one and only feared Professor Snape. Molly didn't bat an eyebrow as she ushered them in and into seats, before magically serving them until their plates were over filling with food.

Serephina just raised her eyebrows in response, but didn't say anything and began to eat, the remains of her smirk still visible on her face. Sirius just glared from the left of her, she just smirked in response.

Harry sat next to Sirius, in front of the twins. They both intogerrated him.

"Where've-"

"you been-"

"all day-"

"Harrikins?-"

"You-"

"ditched-"

"cleaning-"

"with-"

"us." said the twins, each of them stuffing food into their mouths. Harry, whose good mood hadn't left him yet, was still smiling and eating with vigor, something which Molly noticed and nodded, pleased. "Oh, I was just talking with Sirius and Aunt Seph. " he said before hastily scooping food into his mouth, not noticing (or ignoring, which ever you prefer) the surprised chokes and raised eyebrows.

Eyes turned to the couple seated in the center of the table. As Serephina felt there stares, she met them all, glaring unblinkingly fierce, which quickly forced the stares somewhere else. Serephina snorted and looked around. The Wolf was chatting with Molly and Arthur quietly in the corner, Harry and the twins were laughing and kept stealing glances at Sirius, who kept a constant glare at her, which she disregarded. The Weasley girl was quietly eating her dinner, sitting next to Granger and the youngest Weasley boy, looking amused. The latter had his head close by Hermione's whispering in her ear, giving Serephina and Sirius disapproving looks. She just sat with an ever growing frown on her face.

Back to Harry and the twins...

The twins kept smiling mischieviously at Harry, and winked at him. The two were practically jumping up eagerly when Serephina took a sip of her drink. Sirius looked down and smirked discreetly. Serephina just kept an impassive face even as the twins looked put out. "Awwwwww... "

Serephina turned her gaze towards them and quirked an eyebrow. They looked nervously back.

"Boys," she began, cackling on the inside as they winced a her soft tone, "Nice try." Sirius was biting the inside of his cheek, smirk no visible. The twins looked confused for a second, before spotting Sirius' smirk. "Aww, why did you tell her, Sirius?" They whined together.

Sirius took a sip out of Serephina's cup. "Oh, I didn't tell her." The twins looked at their Professor in shock, this had been one the sneakiest things they had done, they had hoped to prank their Professor.

Serephina raised an eyebrow in the twins direction. "Do you me incompetent? Does spy in the Dark Sect mean nothing to you?" she asked.

"Well, uh-uhmm," the twins chorused together. Serephina's eyebrow was still quirked as she continued.

"Besides, that acute prank was nothing compared to everything I have caught and or avoided." The twins looked confused. "Why would you need to avoid pranks Professor? We mean besides from us, we mean."

Serephina turned to look ather husband. Sirius caught her inquiring brow and gave an almost unnoticable shake of head. Serephina smirked.

"Well," Serephina began ,"The Marauders were in my graduating class, for one." Harry smirked, he knew where this was going. Then, he paled as he also knew that the twin would kill him. Oh crap. Remus' head lifted slightly at the name 'Marauders'.

The twins eyes were the size of their dinner plates. "You know the Marauders!"

"Well, unfortunatly I did marry one." Serephina sniffed disdainfully. Sirius glared at her. She just smirked in response.

The twins were frozen in their seats.

Everyone just continued there normally...

Well, as normal as anyone in this house could be.

* * *

**(A.N.) So that's the 4th chapter. Sorry for the semi- suckiness. Just count it as filler I guess. Please read and review.**

**Next chapter: probably an Order meeting where they all find out about Seph n Siri. Maybe some smut. Maybe.**


	5. Oh, Screw the Damn Meeting!

**(A.N.) Wooo! Update!**

**Annabeth Volturi- Thank you so much for reviewing. You have been the constant reviewer and have kept me inspired. Thank you. Oh, and I've also just discovered your story Nothing's Gonna Stop Us, it is frickin' amazing!**

**Misunderstoodloony- No, I have decided in this story James didn't tease Seph cause he liked her, he teased her because she kept convincing Lily that he wasn't worth the time of day. **

**ExtraordinaryGeek- I'm glad you think so!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter...Draco might though ;)**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year.**

**Oh, yeah, and this takes place during Harry's 5th year Easter Break, so the kids and Serephina don't have to attend school til about a week. **

***Sorry for any errors, if they are that bad please tell me and I'll fix ASAP. Thnx!***

"Dialogue"

* * *

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 5- Frozen Gingers pt. 2/Screw the Damn Meeting**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

The twins were still standing gaping at Sirius for all they were worth.

"Sirius, you're a MARAUDER!" they said together, still shocked.

Sirius, who was still eating, raised an eyebrow very Snape like and said, "Yeah." In a 'duh' voice. Remus snorted, Sirius just smiled at him. The twins immediately ran to the other side of the table and started to bow while chanting 'We are not worthy, we are not worthy' over and over again.

Sirius's eyebrows were up and he stood up, lifting the twins to their feet. The latter two squealed and said to themselves 'We were picked up by a Marauder!' jumping up and down ecsatically.

Serephina huffed in exasperation. "Gods, didn't they know? All this worship is giving me a migraine."

Harry covered up a laugh with a faux cough. "They didn't know, Aunt Seph." He said quietly. Serephina exhaled sharply. "Bloody fantastic! What else do they not know? What about the Wolf?" She gestured to Remus, who rolled his eyes.

The twins turned their heads to Remus. "Are you a Marauder to Remus?" They looked like five year olds that got stuck in a candy store with free reign.

"Pffft," went Sirius. "If you didn't know how to prank well Moony, I wouldn't have counted you as a Marauder with all your studying."

"Your Moony?" The twins shouted. "Boys, take it down." Chided Molly, exasperated as well. They just disregarded her. Fred and George looked at each other as realization hit them. "Ohh, that makes sense." But then their heads turned up sharply, facing Remus. "But wait, Moony your a Professor! A Marauder can't be a Profesor!"

"Would you rather I didn't teach you?" Remus asked nonplussed. The twins shook their heads wildly. They quickly faced Sirius again. "If he's Moony, then who're you Sirius?"

Serephina snorted. "The mutt of course." Sirius pouted at her and when that didn't work he glared. That didn't work either.

"Padfoot!" The twins exclaimed. "Your Padfoot!" Sirius nodded at them before changing into Padfoot, barking at them. He walked around the room as any dog would even made Remus stumble as he stood up. Remus just whacked his head in response.

Dark eyes glinting mischieviously, Padfoot bounded towards a sitting Serephina. He jumped onto his rear legs and licked her cheek, earning a few chuckles. "Uhhhh, get off you bloody mutt!" Serephina practically snarled, roughly pushing Padfoot to the floor. Padfoot sat up and let out a loud whine. Serephina just sneered at him.

When Padfoot changed back to Sirius, he sat back down and gave a winning smile towards his wife, who raised an eyebrow that implied she wasn't impressed and turned back to her plate. Smirking, he leaned towards her and caught her by surprise when she turned her head to probably glare at him, and caught her lips in a searing kiss.

Serephina froze in surprise, but eventually gave in as she tangled her hands into Sirius's hair to pull him closer. The impromptu kiss lasted only around ten seconds as Serephina's mind returned to reality.

Pushing Sirius off, she glared fiercely at him. Seeing it Sirus gave her that arrogant smirk. So, she slapped him. Hard.

Harry was snickering into his palm, as was Ginny. Hermione and Remus were pursing their lips looking like they really wanted to laugh, but had more self control. Ron was a bright red and the twins were giving Sirius big grins, holding thumbs up while mouthing 'Nice.' The elder Weasleys just ignored everyone, trying to have a normal meal, and were just conversing with themselves.

Meals were from there on in Grimmauld Place described as one word: eventful.

* * *

When dinner was over, and the children were upstairs, the adults (well more like just Molly)prepard the dining room for the Order meeting for the night. (It wasn't supposed to start in about an hour, but still.)

Serephina was dragging Sirius through the Third floor hallway, knowing no one went here since there was plenty of Dark magic on this floor. She dragged her husband here so she could yell at him. Kissing her in front of most of the Weasleys, how dare he, that bastard.

What Serephina didn't notice in her rage, however, was the heated looks Sirius kept giving her as she pulled him towards the more uninhabited part of the house.

Stopping in the middle of the hallway, Serephina fixed a glare upon her face and turned around, only to find herself pushed up against the wall behind her and rendered unable to speak as Sirius captured her lips in a hot passionate kiss that managed to send pleasurable thrills down her spine.

No! Serepina's mind rebelled. You are supposed to be yelling at him! Not snogging him senseless. She weakly tried to push Sirius back, but he growled low in his throat, picking her up and wrapping her legs around his waist.

**Warning! Smut!**

**...**

**...**

**...**

**..**

**.**

Immediately, Serephina could feel Sirius's hard, demanding arousal pressing up against her and she groaned, losing resolve. Still wanting to talk what happend over dinner, she tried untangling herself reluctantly. Sirius's growl was louder this time and he let go of her lips and attacked her neck instead. Nipping all the way to her ear, he whispered huskily, "I want you Seph."

Serephina shivered at Sirius's tone of voice that never failed to get her wet. Oh, screw it! she thought and tugged at Sirius's shirt, wanting it off. Sirius ferally grinned in her neck as he felt Seph submit and teared off her own shirt, practically ripping it off.

Knowing that there was an Order meeting in less than hour, Serephina pulled Sirius back up to her, whispering hotly, "Hurry Sirius." The desperation in her voice is what set him off.

Sirius's eyes were as dark as Serephina's, if not more. His hands were frantic as he quickly pulled off his boxer shorts that Seph was still wearing. As he was doing this, Serephina managed to take off Sirius's shirt, seperating their lips temporarily.

As Sirius reconnected their lips, Serephina worked on unbuttoning Sirius's jeans. Grasping his wand, she flicked it once, putting a ward around the floor and threw the wand onto the floor, reaching back for Sirius, who was worrying her neck between his lips.

"There b-bett-ter n-not be a, ahhhh, m-mark." Seph said breathlessly, moaning quietly. Hearing this, Sirius's eyes glinted animalistically, before biting Seph hard enough to draw blood. "Siri!" Serephina tangled her hands into his hair, pulling him closer as he lapped at the small wound. Serephina groaned and arched hard into Sirius, grinding right against his arousal.

Sirius groaned right back and pulled down his jeans and boxers far enough to release his aching cock. He hissed as Serephina wildly bucked against him, desperately trying to get any type of friction. She grabbed his head and just as he did to her moments earlier, trailed her lips up to his ear, voice hoarse, saying ,"Now, Sirius, I need you now."

He harshly thrust up into her in response. They both moaned at his intrusion, quickly setting up a fast pace with barely any rhythym, wanting release quickly.

Her fingernails dug into the warm skin of his back, making long, red angry marks that made him hiss in pleasure. His deep thrusts seemed never-ending as he kept himself plunging in and out of her, seeking desperately to satisfy all of the insatiable hunger that had slowly built up inside him for the last decade and a half he hadn't been able to touch her, claim her, make her his.

Seph seemed to feel the same way as she wrapped her legs tighter around his waist to encourage him to pound harder and deeper into her willing body, her arms shaking violently with every thrust into her.

When Sirius's thrusts quickened and became powerful enough to cause the table and antique vase somewhere farther along the wall to shatter noisily with their movement, the sounds Seph was making also heightened and she had to bite down hard onto Sirius's shoulder to keep from screaming to loud. Again, Sirius growled at this and began to ram himself even more furiously against her body, trying to get a louder reaction out of her, a bead of sweat trickling slowly down the side of his face.

Sirius thrust into her hard, deep, and furious just as his Dog animagus would do to any bitch.

"_G—gods! -gods! U—ugh…S-Siri…Siri…SIRI!"_

Seph clawed at Sirius's back as her orgasm took her, drawing a few bloody lines across his back. He thrust a few more times, not slowing, into her to empty out the few remaining traces of the violent orgasm he had, before slowing, and finally letting out a weak exhale of breath and very carefully turning them around so that his back was against the wall and slowly slid down, still inside her.

Their foreheads pressed together, and they simutaneously opened their eyes, gazing into the others. Sirius's eyes returned to his normal mischievious grey and traced Serephina's cheek with his thumb.

Serephina placed her left hand on top of his hand and smacked him hard upside the head with her right. "OW!" Serephina glared at her husband, but there wasn't any real heat. Sirius gave her that knowing smirk and she glared, moving to gather their things.

Unforetunately or fortunately (depends how you see it), Serephina forgot that Sirius hadn't pulled out yet and as she leaned to the side, she caused him to hit that spot that got her to stop and tilt her head back and moan brokenly, despite her recent orgasm.

Sirius's eyes were dilated in arousal again, before turning and pushing Seph back against the wall roughly.

**End of Rated Scene**

**.**

**..**

**...**

**...**

**...**

Here we go again...

So, much for that Order Meeting...

* * *

**(A.N.) Whew! 5th chapter! Hope ya'll liked it! And more smut yay! Next chapter probably won't have any smut, but it's the Order Meeting...or what's left of it at least. Please R&R! Thnx!**


	6. Order Meeting of Epic Revelations

**(A.N.) Chapter 6! Enjoy!**

**Annabeth Volturi- Yes I did, didn't want to disappoint! ^_^ Here's your reactions! Hope you enjoy!**

**Aro's Bride- I don't think this chapter is longer, but I hope you enjoy anyway!**

**Thanks for reviewing guys (or girls)! **

**Legal Disclaimer: As I am not British (though I can pull of an accent) nor blond and do not have the initials of JKR, I do not own Harry Potter. **

***Excuse the errors please, doing this on my Ipad, as my computer is down!***

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year**

******Oh, yeah, and this takes place during Harry's 5th year Easter Break, so the kids and Serephina don't have to attend school til about a week. **

* * *

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 6- Order Meeting of Epic Revelations**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

Serephina sighed in contentment as Sirius went lax against her, pinning her body against the wall, having finally come inside her. She shivered as the cool air hit them, rapidly cooling their overheated bodies. Sirius pressed closer in response, kissing all the red and purple marks he had made on her neck.

'That bastard' thought Serephina tiredly. 'I said NO marks.'

After kissing the last one, Sirius looked back up at his worn out wife and whispered, "I love you, Seph."

The way Sirius looked at her, was enough for Serephina to unconsciously quicken her breaths. "I love you, too." She replied back, whispering just as Sirius, as though both were afraid louder voices would break the tranquility. Sirius smiled at her in return.

Serephina winced as she felt Sirius pull out, still a little sore. Sirius kissed her forehead and flicked his wrist, gathering their disregarded items and his wand. Sirius redressed Serephina gently before straightning himself out. Flicking his wand, he cast a quick tempus.

Both parties let out a swear when the saw the time, 8:52 p.m., exactly eight minutes before the Order Meeting. "Fuck."

Gazing at each other, Serephina and Sirius eyes widened , before they both ran to the stairs, rushing to their room, quickly raiding the closet for anything they could wear. Serephina took out a small bag from her black cloak she had left here, and immediately put an outfit toghether with, surprisingly, almost no black, except for her boots, that is.

Serephina quickly grabbed wand and applied a Glamour upon her neck to hide any evidence of just what she and Sirius had been up to.

Stealthily bounding down the stairs and into the dining room, Serephina and Sirius barely made it in time before the door had closed shut. Each letting a quiet sigh of relief they both ignored the questioning looks of most of the Order (especially at her not black clothes) and Remus's all knowing inquiring eyebrow.

Serephina took her usual seat at the right of the Headmaster and Sirius at the right of Remus.

The Headmaster rested his folded hands on top of the table and began the meeting of the night.

* * *

"Well, if that is all, I hope you all have a pleasant night and we will next meet here again on Monday night, yes?" said the Headmaster, who got several nodds in return.

Serephina glared at the wall in front of her. The damned Order meeting lasted two and a half hours. Two and a half bloody hours! She was tired and just wanted to go to sleep. Preferably in Sirius's arms.

Serephina grimaced. Oh, dear Merlin she was becoming maudlin. Sweet Salazar help her.

Before most of the Order was able to leave, however, Sirius turned to Headmaster in excitement.

"Oh, Headmaster! I had alomost forgot, but I have an announcement to make." Serephina's head snapped up at once and turned to glare at Sirius, she didn't want her-their personal business broadcasted to the nosy, gossiping Order.

The Headmaster who did not know the real reason for her glare, chided Serephina gently. "Now, Serephina, I'm sure we can all stay a few moments to hear what Sirius has to say."

"Yeah, Seph, hear what I have to say." Said Sirius mischieviously.

If possible, Serephina's glare intensified and she snarled out, "You better watch what you say Black before you find yourself strung up by your ankles, dangling oh-how many feet from the highest hoop on the Quidditch Pitch."

Remus looked at his best friend with wide eyes. "I'd take that threat seriously, Padfoot, no pun intended."

Sirius just rolled his eyes, used to Serephina's threats. Oh, he knew her bite was worse than her bark, but she wouldn't do anything _that_ bad to him. Well, he at least hoped so.

"It would wise to listen to your Wolf, Mutt." Serephina hissed out, crossing her arms in an attempt to push down her nerves. Sirius, knowing Serephina better than himself, whether he knew that or not, saw right through it and offered a reassuring smile. Her glare was still there, but to a lesser degree.

Turning to the Headmaster, Sirius loudly proclaimed,"Me and Seph-"

Serephina rolled her eyes. "It's Seph and _I_, you uneducated flea bag." Sirius sighed in exasperation. "Yes, well anyway, Seph and _I_," here he gave a pointed look to his wife, "Are married."

Silence.

Literal silence, you could practically hear the grime fall off of Mundugus.

"What! That's absurd!" exclaimed Hestia Jones, looking at Sirius, hoping he would just deny what he just said as though if a prank. Her Sirius would never mix with the wrong sort, not when he had her.

"It's true." said Molly quietly. The Order turned their gazes at her. Molly nodded and continued. "Yes, Sirius and Serephina are married, they told us at breakfast, they even showed us their rings."

The Order just stared at the two in question, speechless.

Professor McGonagall smirked at them both. "I always knew their was something else there besides hate." Sirius grinned while Serephina just sneered at her.

Albus cleared his throat, drawing everyone's attention. "Well, I believe a congratulations is in order." Said the Headmaster, whose blue eyes twinkled even more than usual.

Serephina rolled her eyes and was about to make a scathing retort, before she was rudely interuppted.

"But Headmaster, surely this can't be true, it must be some sort of prank. I mean why would Sirius marry that evil, dark Death Eater scum when-" Hestia stopped her tirade when the room temperature dropped several degrees.

Hestia felt a glare on her. And no it wasn't Serephina's.

Hestia was surprised to see her 'beloved' Sirius glare at her.

"For your information Jones, Seph and I have been married for eighteen years." Sirius almost growled out. How dare she? How bloody dare she insult his Seph, when she was risking her own life at the hands and mercy of the Dark Lord just so that the Order had even the slightest insight into the Dark Lord's plans.

Professor McGonagall looked at the pair sharply. "You two would have been just out of school."

Here Serephina nodded. "Yes, we were married a few weeks after graduation." She said hesitantly, showing her collegue and one she considered a friend her wedding band, which had the Black Family's insignia on it, signifying that she was indeed married to Sirius. Minerva looked between her two probably most favorite pupils and smiled softly at them, happy that they both could be happy even in the middle of this war.

Hestia recoiled as if she had been slapped when she saw Serephina's ring. Now it seemed more real. Standing up straighter, she continued on. "Well, as you all know and see," she said, talking to the remaining Order,"This marriage isn't good for Sirius at all. He is clearly being abused an harassed."

Remus butted in here. "Hestia, despite your own beliefs, this marriage_ is_ good for Sirius. He actually smiles again and there is finally someone who can actually discipline and keep him on a tight leesh."

The still stunned remaining Order snorted into their palms. That _was_ true. If there was anyone who could calm and control Sirius Black, it would be Serephina Snape.

Still, Hestia continued on stubbornly. "But-but-but didn't you hear her threat awhile ago? She was threathning him bodily harm!"

Tonks' snorted at this. She looked directly into Hestia's gaze and said, "Hestia it just wouldn't be Professor Snape without any threats of harm."

"Besides," began Sirius looking fondly at his wife. "It's all part of her charm." Serephina just raised her most likely trademarked eyebrow.

Turning to Hestia, the Order was surprised to find Sirius's eyes tinted with a dangerous glint. "Oh and Jones, Seph is a _spy_ for the _Order_, yes she may have a Dark Mark, but that doesn't make her evil."

Hestia still didn't give up, knowing that if she persevered Sirius would be hers. "But she's a Dark witch-"

Sirius just looked on unimpressed. "Just because she has an affinity for Dark magic doesn't mean she's evil."

Before Hestia could go on, she was interuppted by a clear, drawling voice. "You know Jones, Sirius is a Dark Wizard." "No he's not," Hestia tried to deny vehemently. "Yes, actually I am," answered Sirius looking Hestia right in the eye. "My magic is Dark affinic, so that makes me a Dark Wizard. Does that mean I'm evil?"

"Of course not!" exclaimed Hestia. "My point exactly," said Sirius. Hestia shut her mouth as she _did_ get the point.

"Well," started Moody gruffly,"It _is_ a good match, not that I would know anything of that sort."

"True,"began Daedalus Diggle,"It has seemed to calm Sirius and has got even Serephina to wear colour!" **(A.N. Seph's wearing dark blue jeans, a white tank, a grey cardigan and her black dragon hide boots.)**

Serephina huffed and sneered at Diggle who flinched back.

Albus smiled at the Order, glad most of them agreed to this marriage. Serephina had always been bitter and cold, a family, no matter how small, could be all for the best. And Sirius, who had been wrongly imprisoned for twelve years, needed something to keep him from going insane as he needed to stay hidden, lest the Ministy catches him. All in all, a perfect match. Besides, the way the two argued, well, at least their marriage wouldn't be bland and boring.

This time Albus dismissed the Order for real. All, well except for one, left with either smiles or smirks painted upon their faces.

Serephina was still in her seat, massaging her temples as she muttered something that sounded like 'about time those bloody dunderheads left.' Sirius shook his head and smiled as he heard her comments.

Coming up behind her, Sirius knocked her legs from under her and caught her, carrying her bridal style, before making his way towards the door. As Serephina got over her shock, she hit her husband in the chest, hissing. "Put me down, Sirius! Right now!"

"Sorry, no can do, Darling." Sirius said smiling, showing off his rather boyish dimples.

Serephina just huffed in anger as she saw there was nothing she could.

She just glared at her Dog-like husband when she heard the chuckles coming from the dining room.

"I. Hate. You." Serephina hissed. Sirius just smiled wider. "Awww, I hate you, too love."

Serephina just glared again. Sirius chuckled in response.

* * *

**(A.N.) Wow 2 chapters in 1 day! I'm amazed at myself! Please R&R! **


	7. You Find Out New Things Everyday

**Annabeth Volturi- That was my favorite part writing, and yes sooo true ;) Thanks for reviewing(again) & I hope you like this chapter.**

**Carly Carnations- Here's your update! Still working on the next Spiritually.. chapter so hopefully I can can get it up next week(maybe) Thanks for the kind words! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter...Draco might though ;)**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year.**

**Oh, yeah, and this takes place during Harry's 5th year Easter Break, so the kids and Serephina don't have to attend school til about a week. **

***No beta so all mistakes are mine!***

* * *

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 7- You Find Out New Things Everyday**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

It was a cloudy, Sunday morning, a little dreary to be overly energetic (if you're not the twins), and the children staying in Grimmauld Place for their Easter break were in the library, waiting for breakfast.

Hermione was immersed of course in a thick book that had catched her interest, being displayed on an intricately decorated shelf. Ginny and the twins were talking with Harry, who had just walked in, about pranks, mumbling about pranking Sirius and Professor Snape.

Ron was frowning darkly in an armchair, a few feet from everyone else. He suddenly spoke up.

"I don't get it."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Ron, there's a lot of things I bet you don't get."

Ron glared at his sister as everyone laughed. Hermione rolled her eyes. "What is you don't get, Ronald?" His face relaxed a second, at least someone was hearing him out.

"Sirius and Snape," he said.

The twins were straight faced. "Yes, Ronnikins, Professor Snape is a girl and Sirius is a boy. They are married, we're glad you finally noticed."

Ginny snorted, while Harry smiled. Ron scowled. "I know, that's what I don't get. How someone like Sirius could marry someone like Snape."

"Professor Snape, Ron," saod Hermione, still reading her book. He ignored her. " I mean, what the bloody hell does she have that other, nicer women, don't?"

The twins looked affronted. "Ronnikins-"

"-if we were"

"-Sirius, we would"

"-marry the"

"-Professor as soon"

"-as possible too."

"We mean,"

"-have you seen"

"-Professor Snape?"

"Under all"

"-those robes she's"

"-insanely hot!"

Ron looked disgusted, he still could not let go of the grudge he held against the Potions Master since the first Potions class in first year. He wouldn't give in that easily.

"So? What has Snape actully done for the war, anyway? It's not like she's that important."

The room was in shocked silence, was Ron really that blind. Apparently.

Besides being blind to all of Serephina Snape's accomplishments, Ron was blind to the shadows in the entrance to the library.

"Well, I can't say that you're of any importance either, Mr. Weasley." Said a silkly smooth voice. Serephina Snape (well technically Black) stood by the library doors with her arms crossed. The only sign of her aggravation, the silkiness of her voice, like a predator captivating its prey. Ron gulped audibly.

"Nothing to say, ? Cat got your tongue?" Serephina purred dangerously.

Ron was sweating bullets, but like the Gryffindor he was, he continued on. "So? You're just a Potions Professor, we can always get another one. We can also get another spy with You-Know-Who, too." I think we all know how everybody who wasn't Ron backed up against the far wall and promptly smacked themselves on the forehead when this was said. Honestly, does he ever think before he speaks? That's an apparent no.

Sirius, who was next to his wife when they entered the library, clenched his jaw in an attempt to hold back anything he might say, this was one of his Godson's friends after all. Instead of blowing up in anger like he expected her to, Sirius was surprised to hear Serephina's cold, aloof voice.

"Wel, it's good to know your views on me . I bid you good luck searching for a better Potions Professor and an available spy. Please feel free to take over my place the next time the Dark Lord calls." Serephina drawled, ice cold and razor sharp. Rom flinched.

After raising an arched eyebrow in the red-head's direction, Serephina summoned the book she wanted and promptly thundered out of the room, ever so graceful, even without her billowing teaching robes.

Sirius stayed behind, he really needed to some serious damage control, no pun intended. He took a deep breath, before settling down in one of the chairs allocated to the library. He waved all those by the wall to settle back down into their seats.

Sirius crossed his arms and leaned back into his chair. "Is that what all of you think about you're Professor?" He asked, gaze meeting every which one of them.

The twins and Harry looked horrified. "Of course not! Aunt Seph's pretty cool...at least when she wants to be."

"Yeah, the Professor-"

"-even let's us use"

"-one of her potions"

"-classroom's and sometimes"

"-even checks and fixes"

"-any mistakes we"

"-had in our"

"-pr-potions."

Sirius's eyebrows almost touched his hairline. "The Professor allows you to make prank potions in one of her available classrooms? And she checks them for mistakes, willingly?"

The twins looked sheepish. "Well yeah, why do you think our pranks work so well, we have Professor Snape check them over so we don't kill or maim anybody." Sirius was laughing quietly.

"Well it makes sense," began Hermione with a thoughtful look on her face. "I mean Professor Snape is _the_ youngest Potions Master in centuries, it would make sense that she could fix your potions. I just can't believe she would actually help you."

The twins shrugged. "We still don't believe it either, but hey, we're not complaining."

"You shouldn't be," began Sirius. "Your Professor, when we would prank her, wasn't like everyone else, she actually struck back." The majority of the room was looking at Sirius in disbelief. "It's true, she would always think of new ways to prank us with Potions, and would get us back like ninety percent of the time, so trust me, you're in good hands when it comes to prank potions."

Fred and George looked ecstatic. "What were they like?"

Sirius winced a bit. "Pretty damn nasty." He said, shuddering. Harry gave his Godfather a look of sympathy. "They couldn't have been that bad?" He said, ending in a question.

Sirius snorted. "Oh, trust me Prongslet, don't get Seph mad enough to actually prank you, they were _that_ bad." Everyone winced, just thinking about it.

Ginny looked up questioningly. "Professor Snape is the youngest Potions Master, right? I didn't know that."

"Oh, yes." Said Hermione excitedly. "Professor Snape got her mastery in only two and a half years, the shortest apprenticeship ever! She's problably the youngest and most recognized Potions Master in the world." Finished Hermione looking pointedly at Ron, who flushed.

"Wow," whispered Ginny, her stunned and impressed faces mirroring mostly everyone else's.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "It honestly doesn't surprise me. Your Potions Professor's a bloody genius. By the time we went to Hogwarts, Seph knew more curses than half of the seventh years and was already working on creating a few new potions. Like all those prank potion we just talked about, yeah all of those were her creation."

"You know," said Harry. "I can actually believe that. Aunt Seph just seems like that kind of person to be insanely smart."

"Yeah," agreed the twins.

"She is. You can"

"-kinda tell from"

"-the way she talks,"

"-we can hardly"

"-understand what she"

"-says half the time."

"The only thing"

"-we've sincerely"

"-only understood"

"-something is when she's"

"-calling us"

"- ginger dunderheaded"

"-annoyances."

Everyone burst into some form of laughter at this. Ron even snorted quietly. "I think that's one thing we'll all understand," said Ginny, between giggles.

Everyone broke off into semi-comfortable silence. Harry bit his lip, hesitant. Sirius saw his look and gave him a questioning look. Harry took a deep breath, gathering his Gryffindor courage befroe asking," How does the whole spy thing work? I mean, how does she not get caught? It's not like the Dark Lord has a special connection like with me to read my mind." Finished Harry, shrugging.

Sirius stood up sharply. "The Dark Lord can get inside your mind?" He asked almost harshly. "Can you feel if he's there now."

Harry looked at his Godfather confused. "No he's not, I would feel it, it hurts, why is that important Sirius?"

Sirius had a dark look on his face. "That's why it's so hard to be an actual spy in the Dark Lord's ranks, he _can_ read your mind. And if he's been in your head, I'm betting he's reading yours, too."

Everyone had horrified looks. "But-but how is that possible Sirius?" inquired Hermione in a shaky voice. "And what of Professor Snape?" she continued. "If You-Know-Who can read minds, how does she stay undetected?"

"There are two types of mind magic," he explained to the frozen in their seats children. "Occlumency and Legilimency. Legilimency is the magic of reading or scanning someone's thoughts and memories, which is what the Dark Lord does. Occlumency is the magic of protecting one's thoghts and memories which is what Seph does. It's extremely hard and requireds a lot of control to learn it and she cannt slip in front of the Dark Lord either because he is the best Legimens in centuries." Sirius said, directing a look Ron's way. He looked down in thought, face flushed in shame.

"Merlin," breathed Ginny. "Just when you think that Professor Snape can't do anything else..."

Everyone gave shaky laughs. Harry froze, eyes wide. "Oh my god! Sirius if Voldemort can get in my head, he could find out Aunt Seph's the spy!"

"Prongslet, deep breaths, there's a spell to hide certain thoughts even from a Legimens, calm down." Said Sirius.

"Do you know it? Can you do?" asked Harry, relieved. Sirius nodded. "I can do it for all of you, because even though Voldemort is the strongest Legimens, there are others out there." Everyone nodded in understanding.

Sirius took out his dark ash wood wand and flicked it quickly saying,"_Men Mentis Obstructus_!"

Each felt a slight weight in their head, before it went as quickly as it came. Everyone looked less on edge, Harry especially, knowing that they weren't endangering their Potios Professor. The lot still looked worried though, still mulling over the fact someone could read their thoughts.

Harry looked at Sirius. "How did Professor Snape learn Occlumency? Are there any books, or..." He began hesitantly.

Sirius summoned a few books, setting them next to his godson. "Professor Snape learned Occlumency from the Headmaster, himself, here are several books if you want to read on it." Harry looked put out, he wasn't on talking terms with the Headmaster at all. "Do you think, Aunt Seph would teach me?" He asked quietly.

Sirius raised an eyebrow, thinking it over. "She probably would if you asked her nicely. Nicely key word there. But I have to warn you kid, Occlumency iwas a hard thing to learn, and let me tell you, Seph isn't the coddle type of teacher."

"No, really we've never noticed," said Harry. Everyone snorted. That was to true. "Wait," said Harry, looking up at his godfather. "You said it _was_ hard to learn, do you know Occlumency, Sirius?"

His godfather nodded. "Mmmhmm. But you should really ask Seph to reach you, she's better at explaining than I am, she is a Professor after all." The lot looked at Sirius with new eyes. Harry smiled at Sirius and they stood up, heading to the kitchen at Mrs. Weasley's loud call of 'Breakfast!', determination shining in emerald eyes.

* * *

**(A.N.) Wow, chapter 7! More revelations next chapter!...and maybe a chaotic Order meeting? Hmmm...decisions, decisions.**

**Please R&R!**


	8. Potions Shocker

**(A.N.) Scroll down for the chapter.**

**Greetings to the fine folk that moderate our site.**

**Myself, along with many, have been writing and posting on your fine site for years now, some of the better examples of up and coming writers out there are now suddenly finding some of the stories we've come to love at risk of being removed without the chance to even rectify our errors.**

**For some, that means the permanent loss of a story. There are those out there that are never able to recover a story in its original form, this is something I find to be almost worthy of a legal action, as while we cannot claim ownership of a character, the stories are OURS and simply destroying them is something that is inexcusable. I myself have lost three stories, because the SUMMARIES (not the actual stories) were not rated G… I wasn't even aware summaries could be rated, nor need to be G if the story itself was rated M.**

**It's quite easy to simply add an MA rating, additional filters or even a simple requirement for a free membership to read the stories presented here, and would cut down on hateful anonymous reviews and posts at the same time, so I have to question as to why such a thing, in all this time, simply wasn't added. On that note, readers, please consider signing this petition: www(dot)ipetitions(dot)com/petition/lemons-for-fanfiction/**

**If you're worried about falsification of a registration then have an appropriate disclaimer and then there can be no dispute, you took your steps and the PARENTS didn't monitor their children, if that is even your concern. If it is more of a personal view or desire then please at least let people know and give them a chance to remove a story that you and yours find offensive, most people on the site are actually rather cordial when it comes to such requests.**

**While I cannot say for sure if this letter will even reach those that may be willing to listen, of if it's more akin to a wide spectrum purge in preparation for something bigger, please understand that you are going to be losing a LARGE number of your writers, and thus your income from a lack of readers if there is not some level of action taken to help with this situation.**

**For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.**

**Psudocode_Samurai**

**Rocketman1728**

**dracohalo117**

**VFSNAKE**

**Agato the Venom Host**

**Jay Frost**

**SamCrow**

**Blood Brandy**

**Dusk666**

**Hisea Ori**

**The Dark Graven**

**BlackRevenant**

**Lord Orion Salazar Black**

**Sakusha Saelbu**

**Horocrux**

**socras01**

**Kumo no Makoto**

**Biskoff**

**Korraganitar the NightShadow**

**NightInk**

**Lazruth**

**ragnrock kyuubi**

**SpiritWriterXXX**

**Ace6151**

**FleeingReality**

**Harufu**

**Exiled crow**

**Slifer1988**

**Dee Laynter**

**Angeldoctor**

**Final Black Getsuga**

**ZamielRaizunto**

**Fenris187**

**blood enraged**

**arashiXnoXkami**

**Masane Amaha's King**

**Blueexorist**

**Nero Angelo Sparda**

**Sharkteeth**

**DAPC**

**Kyuubi16**

**bunji the wolf**

**EternalKnight219**

**Shi Kami The Murderous Prodigy**

**DeathNoteMaker**

**Nostalgic Remedy**

**Paco the Taco Maker**

**Slayer of Destiny**

**AislingSiobhan**

**Phoenixmaiden13**

**ImperialMoonBeing**

**If you could do what some other authors have done and post this petition as a temporary new chapter on some of your stories to help spreed the word? It would help a lot.**

* * *

**Legal Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. :(**

**Annabeth Volturi- Sorry, but no meeting in this chapter. There _will_ be more chaotic Order meetings and delusional Hestia in future chapters to come though so please bear with me.**

**BarbarafromGR and Aro's Bride - Both of you don't worry I WILL NOT KILL off either Sirius or Serephina, that's as much as I can give away right now. **

**Extraordinarygeek- I love Protective Sirius too! Hmmm...I wonder what Jealous Sirius would be like... ideas, ideas**

**I.C.2014- Hope you enjoy the update!**

**Thanks to everyone for reviewing!**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)...probably the overuse of commas...**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year**

**As this is AU, I am changing some things, like who created what and stuff like that.**

***No beta, so all mistakes are mine, please excuse them!***

* * *

**Unconventional **

**Chapter 8- Potions Shocker**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

Frowning, Harry, Sirius, and Remus scoured Grimmauld Place's halls for one Serephina Snape. She hadn't turned up for breakfast and they were worried about her. They checked Sirius and Serephina's bedroom, the whole second and first floors, even the extensive library.

Heading back for the dining room, the three met the others who were also searching for the Potions master.

"Have any of you found anything?" asked Remus, looking at the twins, Ginny, and Hermione. They all shook their heads no. Sirius sighed and sat down, taking a sip of water from his mug. He felt that he should know where his wife had disappeared to, obviously making her forget the time and skip breakfast.

Sirius smacked himself on the forehead and slowly dragged his hand down his face. "I am so stupid."

Everyone stared at him in confusion of his sudden outburst. Sirius got up and quickly walked into the hallway. "I know where she is!" The lot was hot on his heels when he said this. Sirius went all the way to the end of the corridor, stopping at a simple ebony door with an ornate golden handle.

"Sirius, Professor Snape can't be in there, the door is always locked and no one has been able to open it, even Moody." said Hermione, confused. Sirius rolled his eyes. "I'm not surpised." He snorted. "This is Seph's Potions lab, of course she would ward it."

"This door leads to the dungeons." (A.N. not sure if Grimmauld Place has dungeons, but it's my story so blah!) The children looked absolutely horrified. Remus just rolled his eyes. "Sirus, stop scaring the children, honestly." He sighed.

"You're no fun Moony." Sirius pouted. Turning back to the kids he said,"No, they're not dungeons, but remember this room was and is now inhabited by Professor Snape, so don't touch anything, I'm sure you'll get turned to a very expensive potions ingredient that she would no doubt store in a pickled jar." Remus just rolled his eyes again at Sirius's antics.

Everyone was silent as they nodded almost feverently. Sirius put a finger in front of his lips and made a 'shhh' gesture, slowly creeping down the flight of stairs.

Even though they were scared the lot excitedly crept down into the 'dungeons'. When they reached the bottom step, everyone was standing in awe. They didn't think Grimmauld Place's 'dungeon' would be this large or clean.

There were bright lights that illuminated that slightly cream walls. There were multiple sized mahogany tables and on them differently sized cauldrons. There were the standard pewters, and what looked to be solid gold and silver cauldrons. There was also a large basin at the back of the room that were currently soaking used cauldrons.

There were dark mahogany shelves that were stacked with more Potion ingredients then anyone had ever seen (even at Hogwarts) and a plethora of books, and tomes, and what looked to be journals.

There was a table parallel to the others that carried lots of equipment: ladles, a few smaller knives and silver slicers, rods and stirrers, the smaller vials and funnels, and Potion strainers.

Sirius had spotted Serephina immediately, her presence just seemingy calling out to him. She was looking at a set of flowers (no doubt ingredients) and was writing and scribbling away at the parchment in her hand furiously. Serephina had that thoughtful frown on her face that she always wore when she was inventing new Potions, or revising them.

Harry caught his godfather's gaze and follwed until he found his'Aunt'. he looked at her in surprise at the level of concentration on her face. Hermione just looked excited, ecstatic to be watching Serephina apparently in an 'Potions Master' mode. The twins and Ginny were just shocked that their Professor hadn't noticed their arrival.

The twins looked on in excitement as they found an ingredient they needed to make on of their newer pranks : Leech juice. Gred and Forge looked at each other before sneaking quietly from the rest of the group. Just as they were about to grab it, a pair of angry, red stinging hexes hit them right on the behind. They both yelped and everyone turned their heads to look at them.

The twins were busy rubbing away the painful sting, but froze when they heard the chiding voice. "Take that jar and I'll turn you both into leeches to restock my stores." Came the mild reply from the still scribbling Potions Master.

The twins blushed and looked sheepish at the exasperated looks they got. Ginny actually went up to them and smacked them upside the head. "Honestly, to think we thought you two had more tact! To actually _take_ from Professor Snape!" They looked properly chatised.

"Mind that silver cauldron, Wolf, it's expensive." Serephina drawled out, eyes never leaving the plants and parchment in front of her.

Remus rolled his eyes at the jab and looked down to see he was less tha a foot away from a silver cauldron. He (as everyone else) had wondered around, curious.

Sirius went up to his wife, put the plate of food he brought her down (as he knew she wasn't going to eat when she was this enraptured with her Potions insert a Sirius eye roll here), sat down beside her and looked over her shoulder to see what she was working on. She tilted the paper before he could see anything though. "Oh, come on Seph! Let me see what you're working on! Please!" He added, giving her his best pleading puppy dog look. "No Sirius," she said turning over the plants, inspecting closely, especially the flower.

"Please?"

"No."

"...Pretty please?"

"No."

"...Pretty pretty please?"

"No, Sirius!"

Sirius pouted at his godson who was standing with his arms crossed, laughing at him. Harry just smiled cheerily back. Sirius just tongue out in response. Harry laughed again.

"Put that organ back inside your damnmable mouth, Black, or I'll cut it off and stick in a poison, Merlin pray for the victim."

Giggles resounded through the air, permeating the quiet atmosphere. Sirius put a hand over his mouth and gazed at his wife with wide eyes.

Hermione was reading through a very detailed Potions text. Her eyes furrowed when she couldn't find the Wolfsbane. She checked the publishing date and found the text only to be a few years old. Surely, the Wolfsbane was already invented by then? She knew from research that it hadn't appeared until about 1976-1977, but she could never find the recipe, no matter where she looked, even when she scoured the restriction section.

"Professor?" she hesitantly called out to the Potions Master, who was currently putting the plants she had been taking notes on away. "Yes, Miss Granger?"

Hermione took a deep breath before continuing. "Do you have the recipe for Wolfsbane? I can't find it or the creator anywhere."

Serephina instantly froze. "Why do you need the recipe, Miss Granger?" She replied, emotionless. Everyone's eyes were focused on the two women, listening in on the conversation.

Hermione was losing confidence quickly. "I-I just wanted to study it Professor, perhaps try to think of ways to revise it."

"I'm not giving you the recipe, Miss Granger."

Serephina swallowed harshly. As if she hadn't tried, her, the youngest and most reknown Potions Master alive. It was harder than even _she_ thought possible, and that was saying something. Serephina Snape was never one to over or under estimate.

"Oh, tha-that's a-alright Professor." Said Hermione in a small voice.

Sirius put an arm on his wife's still tense shoulders. "Seph?" "Seph, why won't you give her the recipe for the Potion? It is a world known Potion after all."

Serephina sighed. "Yes, I know, but the Potion is known, not the ingredients or instructions." She said turning to face the lot, who were now gathered around the pair.

Harry looked confused. "Then who gave you the recipe, Aunt Seph?"

Serephina didn't meet anyone's eyes as she kept her head up. "No one gave me the recipe, Harry." She said quietly. Remus inhaled sharply. Sirius looked at his wife in shock at the implications.

"Then how do know how to make the Potion, Professor?" asked Ginny, voicing the confusion of the lot. Serephina cleared her throat. "Miss Weasley, usually when people create something they do not tend to forget the steps to forget it again." Serephina said, almost no frost in her voice. Sirius's hand on her arm tightend at the admission.

The room was in silence. Well...until Hermione broke it with her excitement. "Oh my-...You invented the Wolfsbane, Professor? That's amazing! How did you do it? It must have taken so long to create a draft, not to metion the idea to create it in the first place. How long did it take you? It was said to appear around 1976-1977, so you would have been about _seventeen_ at the time! That truly is amazing, Professor." She babbled about until Harry loudly said 'Hermione!', stopping her excited chatter.

"Never pegged"

"-ya as a"

"-chatter box"

"-Hermione."

The twins said smirking, effectively causing said girl to blush.

Remus was looking at Serephina with a look so full of gratitude, it made her fidget a bit. (and Serephina Snape _never_ fidgets!) "You created the Wolfsbane?" He asked bluntly, or what Serephina would say tactlessly.

"I-I..." Serephina looked into her husband's inquiring grey eyes for a moment, before turning back to Remus. "I did."

Serephina stiffend as she was embraced in a hug by a practically teary Werewolf. Serephina glared fiercely at the Wolf, as she was surrounded by the chuckling, commenting lot.

"Thank you, Serephina."

"That's so cool, Aunt Seph."

"Damn Professor, you just get even more awesomer everyday."

Serephina just rolled her eyes, and started muttering about 'useless, sentimental Gryffindors who were going to ruin her damn reputation.' This set off more laughter. She just huffed and crossed her arms good naturedly.

What really surprised was when Sirius went up behind her and hugged her from behind, chin on her shoulder. "Why?" That question could be translated to many things, but as always she understood him.

"Because you always talked about how bad Lupin felt when he would wake up in the Infirmiry and not remember anything." He smiled into her neck and whispered a quiet 'thank you' in her ear, which caused her to glare at him, saying, "You better not be going all maudlin on me, Mutt." Sirius just smirked at her. "Wouldn't dream of it."

* * *

**(A.N.) Sorry for the short chapter! Just had to get something out there and what's better than having the characters all bond? Please read & review! Thanx!**


	9. Some Sirius Worries

**(A.N.) Heyy! Chapter 9! Wooo! I've basically been all depressed and had no motivation the past week, but that's no excuse...yeah I'll just blame it on my father who put me in this uninspired mood, considering I had to spend an entire weekend with him...Anyway, here's that chapter ya'll waited for!  
**

**Annabeth Volturi-I'm ecstatic that you love this fic, so thanks for being my rock! XD**

**JustSomeNamelessFellow-Thank you, I never really noticed that her comebacks were getting better...I'm probably just taking my anger out in this fic.**

**ExtraordinaryGeek-Aww! Thanks, I liked it too!**

**Thanks for the reviews guys! XD**

**And thanks for all the loyal readers who have stuck with me!**

**Legal Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, that belongs to Miss Rowling.**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year**

**"Dialogue"**

**'thoughts'**

* * *

**Unconventional **

**Chapter 9- Some Sirius Worries**

**Third Person POV**

* * *

Lunch was a quiet affair. There was chatter, but not the usual loud, Great Hall sort of screams, thank Merlin.

Molly was up from her seat and was already beginning to collect the dishes that they were finished with. Serephina stood from her seat as well, going to the sink to deposit her plate.

Everyone looked up sharply when they heard the distinct sound of a plate shattering. Serephina was holding her left arm, hissing in pain. "Fuck!"

Harry's head exploded with pain, but disregarding the pain, he looked at his 'Aunt' who had just stormed out of the kitchen and up the stairs, yelling at them to 'Get the Headmaster now!'

Sirius was a pale white as he stared after his wife worriedly. Remus went to Floo the Headmaster. The Headmaster quickly came out of the fireplace and barely had any time to question why he was needed when Serephina came down the stairs in a rush, carrying black as night robes and a white silverish mask, giving a look to the Headmaster, acknowledging that she had to go. He nodded in response.

Serephina reached the front door and exited quickly, spelling on her Death Eater robes, she was just about to walk from the wards and apparate until someone suddenly grabbed he arm from behind.

Sirius yanked his wife to him and gave her a desperate kiss that said all his worries and pleas to come back unscathed. The kiss lasted a few seconds, but Serephina got the message and with a reassuring nod stepped from the wards and apparated, a servant answering her Master's call.

**I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I **

Sirius was pacing back and forth, pratically wearing a whole through the floor of the drawing room, his normal bright and mischievious grey eyes almost lifeless. Harry was sitting on the couch just watching his godfather walk back and forth. Remus was sitting next to Harry, letting him lean against him as they both watched the restless dog animagus wear through the floor, as they had already tried to calm him, but to no avail.

"Sirius, Professor Snape will be fine." said a slightly shaken Hermione, sitting on one of the chairs available. The Potions Professor had left a little over an hour and a half ago.

"Yeah," agreed Ginny. "Padfoot, it's Professor Snape, the best example of anything Slytherin, she has quick reflexes and if she can put up with the twins, she can handle a few lousy Death Eaters."

"Yeah that's ri-HEY!" Said the twins together, looking affronted at their baby sister, who stuck out her tongue at them.

Sirius lips twitched up a bit. "Yeah, she's the epitome of a Slytherin, she'll be fine." Everyone in the room didn't know if who he was trying to convince, them or himself.

"Sirius, Serephina is an experienced spy and has been doing this for years. She knows the risks and dangers when she offered to spy and she knows them still even now. She is a strong Occlumens, one of the strongest I've ever seen, and her acting and observational skills are honed perfectly. Serephina will be fine." Said the Headmaster softly, but calmly looking at Sirius with his blue eyes.

Sirius nodded, but he caught the worry in Dumbledore's eyes too. He just sighed and slumped into the empty loveseat next to Harry.

Harry bit his lip and looked uncertainly at his Godfather. "Do you want me to look in his mind Sirius? I could probably tell you wh-"

Sirius immediately stood up and grabbed Harry by his shoulders, pulling him to look him in the eyes. "Prongslet, I am worried about Seph, but you don't need to do that. Actually, DON'T ever do that, understand me?" Harry nodded and slumped against his godfather. He was just as worried as him, the slight sting in his scar signaling that Voldemrt was mad.

Sirius held him close. "Prongslet, Seph's already in danger, I don't need you in danger too." He whispered to Harry, who nodded his acknowledgement.

Everyone was silent for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts, before they all scrambled up when they all heard the distinct sound of apparation.

**I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I **

Serephina bit her tongue and breathed sharply through her nose, trembling slightly as she tried to exit from the Dark Lord's presence gracefully and dignified, still in a subserviant bow, backing towards the door. She tried not to stumble as with every step she took a jolt of pain went through her.

The Dark Lord had been angry- furious that she had not brought back any new well, news. And mix that with Lucius and the rest of the politically involved Death Eaters failings to get more of the Ministry under his control, the Dark Lord was practically giddy in torturing all of his followers, basically group torture where everyone was suffering in there own right.

The Dark Lord would have those sometimes when he was angry or just couldn't find anybody worthwhile to torture, Serephina suspected it as both. She took large gulps of breath when she took off her mask and hid it away as she was almost at the end of the wards- only Death Eaters with the Mark could enter, and prepared to apparate. When she felt the tremors slow, Serephina Disapparated back to Grimmauld Place.

**I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I**

Sirus was the first to get to the front door and opened it hurriedly. Immediately there was a slight flash of black before a body had fallen into his arms.

Sirius growled loudly as he scooped up his wife and felt her tortured tremors and heard her labored breaths. He quickly took a deep much needed breath and carried her into the drawing where they just were and set her down on the nearest couch, everyone trailing behind them.

All the gathered kids eyes were wide as they took in their Professors trembling form, face contorted in pain. Everyone flinched at the feral protectiveness they heard in Sirius's growl, even Remus. And most if not all almost flinched again when they saw the Potions Master still wearing her Death Robes, everyone's face going ashen white.

"Oh my lord! Serephina just-just stay there and rest and we'll get you some water and a few pillows and-" Rambled Molly like the mother hen she was. "Molly. Molly! MOLLY!" Yelled Sirius. She quickly faced Sirius. "Calm down."

"Calm down? You want me to -mffh!" Sirius had pointed his wand at Molly and silenced her. He quickly kneeled by Serephina and handed her a vial containing a bright blue potion, an Anti-Cruciatus.

She took it gratefully and downed it with one swallow. Gradually her tremors became farther apart and Serephina sighed in relief when they stopped, and sunk down into the couches cusihions, physically exhauasted.

Sirius got up from the floor and sat down beside her. He put a hand on her forehead and neck, checking if she had run a temperature. He took out his wand, made of dark ash wood and looked at her silently asking for permission. She nodded tiredly against the cushions, closing her eyes.

Sirus waved his wand over his wife, running a Diagnostic Spell on her, before Spell-Checking her vitals. Everything seemed alright (except for the unhealthy weight which he frowned at) and didn't take any longer than two minutes, which was evidently long enough for Serephina to fall into an exhaustion induced slumber. He conjured a blanket and threw it over her.

Everyone was looking at Sirius. Molly was waving her hands around her mouth and Sirius countered his Silencing Spell.

"What do you think you are doing? You're not Poppy, you're probably not even certifed-" Began Molly in a menacing whisper, mindful of the sleeping Potions Master.

Sirius raised a Snape Brow. "Actually I am." Molly spluttered for a few moments, before regaining her composure.

He went back and sat beside his wife's prone form. "Sirius?" asked a questioning Headmaster. He sighed once and brushed the hair away from Serephina's sleeping face.

He looked at everyone in the room, mostly Molly and Dumbledore. "When I was growing up here, my parents wanted my brother and I to take extra lessons besides the given Pureblood ones. My brother chose extra Defense and I chose Healing." He said, eyes darting to Serephina every few seconds.

"I only needed another year or so when I graduated from Hogwarts to finish a Healer's Apprenticeship and get my mastery. I was an Auror and while you get a class on basic field injuries, most of the Aurors kept getting hit by Darker spells and/or curses as the war progressed on and I decided to complete the apprenticeship in the Corps, that way I was fighting or healing, whichever was needed more."

Sirius swallowed. "Obviously it helped a lot when this," he gestured a Seph, passed out on the couch, "Used to happen almost weekly." Remus and the adults present flinched at that.

Hermione was looking at Sirius with new eyes. "So, let me get this straight Sirius. Basically, you're a certified and qualified Healer, disregarding the prison record." Sirus blinked at her. "Pretty much, yeah."

"That's-that's brilliant, Sirius." Said Harry smiling at his godfather. Sirius smirked at him suddenly. "You know technically I _am_ a Healer, and Madam Pomfrey is a Mediwitch..."

"So?" Asked Ginny. "Aren't they the same thing." Sirius was still wearing a smirk that Remus swore was pure Slytheirn. "No, actually. A Mediwitch/wizard would be the same as a nurse in the muggle world," He started, looking at Harry and Hermione. "A Healer is basically like a muggle doctor, so technically since I would rank higher than Madam Pomfrey, she has to listen to me if I was working on a patient."

Realization shone in Harry's eyes. "So if I ever get sent to the Infirmary you could release me early!" Sirius smiled at his godson. "Yup!" He said brightly.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Sirius even if you're qualified, you can't do that!" Said man looked offended. "And why not?" "Because Madam Pomfrey keeps students to check them over before releasing them and making sure that they truly are alright."

"And you don't think as a Professional Healer, that I wouldn't check over Harry before I released him?" Sirius asked. Remus opened his mouth to answer, before he conceded. "...Point taken."

Sirus sighed and ran his hands over his face, massaging his temples in the way Serephina was known to do. "I'm going to take her upstairs." He said, looking at the Headmaster. Dumbledore nodded and said, "Alright, I hope to see both of you down for dinner later, tell me when she awakens." Sirius nodded in acknowledgement before he lifted the too light Potions Masters and went upstairs to their bedroom.

**I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I**

When he got there, Sirius immediately set down Serephina on the bed and started to take off all the extra clothes. He looked on darkly at the black Death Eater robes she adourned. He gently removed her cloak, boots and socks. He removed her robes and draped over the foot of the bed.

Just as he was about to pull the duvet over her, Serephina started to blink groggily. "Si-Sirius?" she said hoarsely. When she confirmed it was him, she slowly sat up and lifted her arms above her head.

Knowing his wife well, he took off her top and pants, leaving her in her panties. He gave her one of his clean shirts he got form his dresser and gently put it on her. She smiled at him slightly before slowly stretching and wincing when something cracked.

Sirius took off his shoes and laid down beside her, pulling her close and trying to drown himself in her scent, her presence. He pulled the duvet over them and traced slow circles on her back, lulling Serephina into a relaxed slumber.

Sirius just watched her sleep, knowing he wouldn't be able to sleep right now. He still remembered-_vivadly_ mind you, when Seph and Reg would come back hurt. He would sort out whoever was worse off first and he didn't want to go through all of that again.

This time, ( considering his brothr had died) all he had left was Serephina and he wasn't he going to lose her, he had just gotten her back, like hell was she going to die or be graviously injured because no one was able to heal her in time, that was his job now and then after all.

He watched Serephina sleep peacefully, which probably didn't come often. He knew, even as a child she had nightmares. Whether it was about her blasted father, Lily, the Dark Lord and/or his Death Eaters didn't matter, Sirus knew that Seph had nightmares of a wide variety and would usually wake up in a cold sweat- her father teaching her early on that a cry out would be unacceptable.

Sirus watched her until his heart slowed down to a more reasonable pace, and buried his nose into her hair, cherishing the fact that only he could hold her like this and no one else. He watched her until his own eyelids felt heavy and dropped closed, still holding onto her tightly, unconsciously afraid of what would happen if he let go.

* * *

**(A.N.) So that's that chapter... Very Sirus (literally). **

**Sorry for the shortness, I still have slight writers block and lack some serious (no pun intended) inspiration. **

**Please Read and Review! **

**Next Chapter: Most likely dinner and perhaps some Serephina/Sirius fluff, depending how nice or evil I feel...:)**


	10. A Sirius Healer

**(A.N.) Well I got this out faster than I thought I would...so enjoy!**

**Aro's Bride-She is a tough one...sorry about no order meeting and no jealous Hestia, I'll be sure to put that in sonewhere for you eventually...**

**SBlover- I like sweet Siri too! Hope you like this chapter!**

**Thanks for your reviews! :D They inspired me to do this!**

**Legal Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. :(**

**Warnings: Highly AU Some major changes to the plot the largest is that Severus is actually a woman named Serephina. Mostly canon except Serephina and Harry don't have a hateful relationship. They're not close, but Harry highly respects Serephina and hates it when her and Sirius fight. Very OOC (Well I think so)**

**Summary: Serephina Snape and Sirius Black are constantly at each others throats. Everyone, even Dumbledore thought he knew their story of past hatred, but what happens when they all find out that nothing's as it seems? What's the real reason behind Mrs. Black's animosity for Sirius. And when did Professor Snape turn hot? Fem!Severus Severely AU 5th year**

***Apologies for any grammatical/spelling error there might be!***

******I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I**

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 10 (double digit chapter! Yay! XD) A Sirius Healer**

**Third Person POV**

**I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I**

Sirius blinked the sleepiness from his eyes groggily. It took a few moments to realize where he was and when he regained his senses, he looked down at his stirring-starting-to-awaken-wife.

Sirius shifted and moved one of his hands that were around her waist to lightly brush over her cheek. Serephina's eyes snapped open abruptly, wildly observing the room, before realizing where she was. When Serephina came to, she (and she would deny this) snuggled back down into Sirius's chest.

The Dog-Animagus smiled as held her closer as well. "How are you feeling?"

Serephina waited a few seconds before she sighed. "Better than a few hours ago (Sirius rolled his eyes. 'Obviously.' He muttered ) but I still feel a little sore."

Sirius nodded and cast a tempus. It was 6:53 p.m., just in time for dinner.

"Let's go down to dinner and I'll massage you later," he said softly, trying to bribe his wife to rise. She tended to stay in bed for about a day or two after the meetings and wouldn't even bother to get up to eat, just demanding a house-elf or probably not even bothering at all. It was totally unhealthy.

She should eat to be able to intake more nutirents so her body could be able to recover quicker. Her weight was already low and she could use the extra calories. Not to mention the extra weight. He should probably perscribe her to take some Nutrition Potions during meals so she could get back into good health and...Sirus shook his head from his doctoral, healerish ramblings.

Serephina groaned. Sirius started to slowly untangle himself from her and was surprised when she didn't hold onto him, demanding him to stay. She just lay down for a moment longer, with a comtemplative expression on her face beofre huffing in dismay. "Fine, let's go to dinner."

Sirius smiled. Serephina sneered.

**I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I**

The beginning of dinner was oddly silent and restless as everyone kept watching the door for any sign of Sirius or Serephina or both. It was a little past seven o'clock and Molly decided to start dinner as Ron was complaining about hunger. The Headmaster sat at the head of the table as usual and was eating quietly.

Everyone was in their usual seats, and the twins kept glancing at the door and back to the two empty chairs across from them, Sirius's and Serephina's usual seats during meals. Nothing was really happening and all the slight conversation between those at the table had been reluctant and quiet.

The twins were about to talk to Harry, who was sitting next to them, about the business more, when you heard a fiery enraged, icy voice that could only be pulled off by one person.

"Mutt! I _demand_ you set me down this instant!"

Everyone looked up at this, and they all looked a little relieved. The kids and even the adults smiled when they heard the next volley of barbs.

"I am perfectly capable of walking down the stairs myself!"

"Yeah, because tripping on the first step down is definitely how a normal person goes down the stairs."

"I did not _fall_ down!"

"Gee, really? Hmm, maybe you should take into consideration that I caught you!"

The kitchen door was opened by Sirius, who was holding Serephina over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. The kids snickered into their palms when they saw their Potions Professor.

As Sirius set her down, Serephina immediately glared at the offending teenagers, who all abruptly went back to their meals, losing color quickly.

Molly smiled at Serephina as she handed her and Sirius plates of food. "How are you feeling dear?" "Alright, thank you." Serephina answered quietly.

The Headmaster cleared his throat, looking at Serephina. She chewed and swallowed the remaining food in her mouth. "Nothing extraordinary, things we've already expected, he was just ahh...angry about his failings to control more of the Ministry." Dumbledore nodded, digging back into his dinner with a thoughtful look on his face.

Dinner proceeded normally, although the conversatons weren't as loud as they normally were. What Serephina didn't know was that after Sirius had carried her sleeping form up to rest, Molly had talked to the children to be quiet so that 'Professor Snape could recover without any mischief to disturb her.'

Serephina gazed at the table in front of her, chewing in contemplation. Hermione had to break it.

"Oh! I've been meaning to ask you Professor, what was the Potion you drank earlier?" The brown haired girl asked, wishing to expand her knowledge. (Like that was a surprse.)

Serephina replied calmly, as if her and Hermione were taking about the weather. "Anti-Cruciatus."

"Oh." Hermione managed to get out, her skin turning just a little bit pale as the rest of the room flinched. Now knowing what made their fearsome, intimidating Potions Professor tremble like that.

Everyone just looked down at their plates, most feeling horrible and a little sad as they heard the Potions Master imply about the torture she'd been through as if was a normal occurance. Most thought it was.

Hermione perked up and lifted her head. "Professor, wait I've never heard or read about an Anti-Cruciatus Potion?" She said a tad bit confused.

Serephina quirked an eyebrow. "That's because I've never formally released it."

"Formally released?" Muttered Hermione, before she was hit with realization. "Oh! You invented it Professor? That's amazing! When did you? Why? Well, it's easy to see why...How did you? Was it difficult? Wha gave you the inspiration? Was it just a random thought? -"

Serephina blinked as she was practically hit by a volley of questions by the once again excited bookworm. "Miss Granger, cease your ramblings." She said in her usual demanding teacher voice. Hermione stopped instantly, blushing.

Ginny just kept looking at Professor Snape. When she got a questioning eyebrow, she said, "I'm not suprised...that you invented Professor. Right now I'm basically convinced that you can do anything."

"Except be nice," Sirius coughed out, setting off snickers. Serephina glared at her husband and took some food off his plate. "Hey! Why are you stealing off my plate when you have you're own right there?"

"Because it is much more satisfying to know that you wanted this morsel of food and couldn't have it because of me."

That set off more snickers, even from the adults. Harry put his hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter, especially when his godfather pouted at a smirking Serephina.

Harry smiled at Serephina. "Glad you're okay, Aunt Seph." He said softy. She gave him a small smile in return, though one could argue it as a smirk. "Me too."

Soon dinner was over and the Headmaster excused himself to go back to Hogwarts.

Molly was already up and bustling, collecting the dishes, waving a hand in dismissal when Serephina offered to spell everything to the sink for her. "No, that's alright dear, you need your rest, it will be no trouble, really."

Serephina watched Harry hand Molly his plate and narrowed her eyes at the faint markings she saw on his hand. Quick as a (pick your own dangerous feline), Serephina reached across the table and grabbed the offending hand. Serephina blinked and then hissed angrily as she realized what was on the back on Harry's hand. "What the hell is this!" She demanded furiously to the scarred hand.

Harry was pale as his 'Aunt' had gestured at the scars ledft by Umbridge's bloodquill. He tried to snatch his arm back and was surprisr when the Profesosor let it go without a fuss. By now everyone was watching the scene unfolding.

Harry thought he was off the hook until he felt himself being pulled around the table near Sirius and Serephina, who took his scarred hand and all but shoved it (surprisingly gentle)at Sirius.

Sirius stared at it uncomprehendingly for a few seconds before he realized what he was looking at. The words I must not tell lies were practically carved into his godson's hand and Sirius knew only one instrument that could do that.

Harry would never describe his godfather to be remotely scary, until he saw the look on his face now. "Who?" Sirius growled out.

Harry swallowed and looked around. Hermione and even Ron was nodding at him to tell. Looking back at his godfather and the furious Potion Master, he sighed. There was no way out of it, so might as well tell them. Harry knew that his Aunt Seph would force it out of him anyways.

"Umbridge." He murmured quietly, enough that no one caught it, except for a very attuned wolf.

He looked concernedly at the three (Sirius, Serephina, and Harry), "What about Umbridge?" He asked hesitantly.

"I'll kill her!" Yelled Sirius. Just as Remus was about to question what for, he lifted Harry's hand so that it could visible to everyone. They all paled when they saw the words, and Remus even growled, eyes glowing eerily amber.

"Sirius you can't! Then you'll really get convicted to Azkaban!" Said Harry worriedly. Sirius sighed. "Harry the only one who should be going to Azkaban is Umbridge. She used a Blood Quill on you."

"So why-" Began Harry.

"Harry, Blood Quills are illegal, they are considered a Dark Instrument of torture, they also damage the magical core." Interuppted Sirius. His godson's eyes were wide at this new revelation.

No one noticed Serephina slip out until she came back a few moments later, a vial and a small container in hand. She handed them both to Sirius, muttering quietly under her breath about how 'she can't believe that toad of a woman would have the nerve to actually use one inside a school' and glaring fiercely at the wall, face in a Slytherin Scheming face.

Sirius uncorked the vial and brought it up to his nose. "Don't trust me Mutt?"

He rolled hs eyes. "Just making sure you grabbed the right one." He handed it to Harry who took it confused. "It's a potion Potter, you're suposed to drink it." Harry huffed at Serephina who smirked and downed it.

Sirius rolled his eyes again. "It's a pain potion, your hand must be hurting even now, so drink it." He said before Harry could protest.

Sirius gently, but thoroughly examined his hand with a critical eye only a doctor (in this case Healer) would have. He nodded in satisfaction.

Remus was off to the side as were the elder Weasleys, and they looked like thye wanted to ask about Harry's ailment. Sirius just rolled his eyes and answered their silent question.

"While the scarring is pretty deep, no doubt the cause of a lot of pain, there is little to no infection in the wound and it should heal without scarring with proper treatment."

Everybody looked surprised at the Professional tone Sirius took. He held up the other container Seph had given him and showed it to Harry. "This is the Essence of Murlap, it will prevent any infection in the scar and will help heal it, putting it on before and after bed would be preferable."

Harry nodded and smiled. "Okay, thanks Siri."

Sirius smiled back too. "No problem kid." He grabbed him by the shoulders and looked him in the eye. "When you run out of salve, go to Professor Snape and she'll give you more, alright?"

Harry nodded. "Ok, but why?" Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Because she made this particular salve and her potions are more potente than others used in healing." Harry looked at his 'Aunt' with wide eyes. "Really?" Sirius nodded. "And that way, at least I know they weren't tampered with and will actually do what they are supposed to."

"Okay," Harry said, happy that he was being cared for.

"Why didn't you tell anyone Harry?" asked Remus, confused at how the toad was getting away with this. He hated her just as much as Harry did, probably more as she always passed pro-anti-creature laws, most on Werewolves.

"Well, I told Ron and Hermione," Harry said sheepishly as his friends looked down, a little ashamed that they weren't able to help their friend.

Serephina rolled her eyes. "Lupin meant why didn't you tell a Professor, Harry." She said in a voice used on toddlers. Harry shrugged. "I tried to tell Professor McGonagall, but she didn't hear me out."

Serephina frowned. that wasn't like McGonagall. "Was there anyone else you kow that had these...detentions with her?" Harry bit his lip and cringed away from Serephina's glare that said 'If you even think of lying, I'll skin you right here!'

He thought about and found himself shaking his head. Serephina looked at him a few seconds more before nodding to herself that he was telling the truth. **( A.N. I'm making it too early for anyone else besides Harry to have Blood Quill detentions)**

"Well," began Molly. "That's enough drama for a night why don't you all tuck into your rooms and get ready for bed, hmm?" All the children nodded and went upstairs without complaint for once. Molly went to tend to the dishes and Arthur went to upstairs to rest, still recovering from his injuries.

When the kitchen door closed and everyone was sure that the children were out of hearing range, Sirius exploded.

"That bloody bitch!"

"Toad," corrected Serephina instantly. "A bitch is a female dog Sirius, or is there something you're not telling me?"

Sirius made a digusted face at her, but sighed sadly and sat down, letting Serephina climb into his lap, bringing her closer to nuzzle her neck. She was the only thing keeping him from thundering (yes thundering) to Hogwarts and killing the damned toad.

When Sirius lifted his head he found Moony staring at them amusedly. "What?" Remus just smirked. "Oh, nothing you guys are just cute." Serephina sneered in disbelief. "Cute? Do I look or in any way seem _cute_ to you?"

"Well..."

Serephina glared at Remus frostily who just smiled innocently at her. She just huffed, taking a blow to her reputation as she was evidently unable to scare the Wolf.

Sirius snorted and gave Moony an approving grin and a thumbs up, which got promptly smacked away.

Remus gave them one more amused smile, before excusing himself and retiring to his rooms, planning and scheming away to get the toad at Hogwarts back, Marauders' style.

Serephina, when everyone left the room, slumped against her husband in exhaustion, the events of dinner sapping the little energy she had gained through the brief respite earlier.

Sirius just smiled softly and kissed his wife's forehead. He stood up slowly, picking his wife up bridal style and carrying her up the stairs. It was a tribute to how tired Serephinna was when she didn't protest to be let down.

As they were going up the stairs, Sirius asked "What are you doing tomorrow?"

"Why plan on asking me out?" Said Serephina sleepily.

"Why is it working?" Sirius said. You could practically hear the smile in his voice. Serephina rolled her eyes. "I was planning on going back to Hogwart tomorrow as I need a change of clothes and a toad to poison, not to mention the Headmaster I have to yell at."

Sirius snorted fondly. "Great, then I'll pick you up at seven. Wear something nice."

"Was that a demand, Lord Black?"

"Of course it was, my lady."

The rest of the night was spent in a calmer mood than that afternoon. Serephina all but demaned to be massaged when they got to their bedroom and Sirius of course, gave in. He grumbled under his breath about 'Stupid Slytherin wives that take advantage of the damn puppy dog eyes and pout.'

Serephina just smirked.

Yup, you could totally feel the love in the air.

******I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I**

******(A.N.) I hope this makes up for not updating so long...**

******Please read and review!**


	11. Softness Found in a Song

**(A.N.) This was a long one coming...sorry for the wait, but my life is...not really stable right now...this is just a filler...**

**SBlover- Don't worry, all I can tell you, when the time comes, Seph won't get caught :)**

**ExtraordinaryGeek-Umbridge's expression would be pretty hilarious right? xD**

**Guest- Thanks! ^_^**

**SouthWorld-Thanks! I love Fem!Sev XD**

**Annabeth Volturi- Here you go! XD Not what's expected and more of a filler...but I hope you enjoy nonetheless! :)**

**brooke.h16-That's why I decided to write one! There aren't any Fem Sev ones that end up with Siri soo...yeah XD**

**asiacheetah- Thank you! XD Here's that update...even if its a filler.**

**lilmisadiva-Thanks for reading and reviewing! ^_^**

**jazmynkim-Here you go! :D**

**Im dead inside-Awww! Thanks! I'm glad you more than like! XD**

**XxBookXxWormXx- Thanks! XD Here's the next chapter!**

**BrendaBanner1234-Thank you so much! XD**

**vivaelanime-OMG! You read my story even when on translate! Thank you sooo much! It means so much to me to know you're reading even when I write in a totally different language! Thanks again! It's things like this that inspire me! ^_^**

**Zipit-Cinderella-Thank you soo much! I'm glad I got you to ship them! XD Here's your update...even it is a filler...^_^**

**Okay guys, no more dallying, here ya go! **

**Unconventional**

**Chapter 11-Softness Found in a Song**

**Third Person POV**

Serephina sighed in relaxation as the lukewarm water hit her skin. It was Monday following Spring Break, and she was back in her private living quarters at Hogwarts. She had come back for a change of clothes and other toiletries, and necessary items to bring to Grimmauld Place with her. She also might have here to yell at the blasted Headmaster, who fortunately for him was not present at the school. Honestly, condoning that bloody toad of a woman to actually have a Blood-Quill inside a school! And not just that, but not even noticing that she had been using it on a student, Potter at that!

Serephina just sighed again, although this time in frustration, willing her body to relax again. She found out years ago when beginning her wok as a spy, that her mind followed the emotions her body exuded, so that if her posture was relaxed, she was relaxed. If her body was tense, then her mind was prepared for any coming assault.

As the knots in her shoulders were forced to relax as by will, Serephina shut off the facets and stepped out of her shower, exiting her bathroom and into her bedroom, drying and dressing herself. When she was finished, she looked around restlessly.

The toad was back at the Ministry for the majority of break and the Headmaster was out, therefore there was no one for her to pester, even subtly. Serephina broke out in a small frown, there go her plans for today. Rolling her eyes, she stood up, grabbed her packed bag, and headed towards the Floo in her sitting room. Looks like she would be back at Grimmauld Place earlier than she thought. As it was almost midday, about 11 am, she knew that the occupants of Grimmauld were either awakened had eaten, or were still sleeping and being unproductive.

As she stepped out of the fireplace, Serephina saw someone she hadn't truly seen in years and who she made sure had never seen her when she was here-Walburga Black.

Walburga made to yell as she hated anyone flooing into her house, when she caught sight of the person stepping out of the fireplace. Walburga's eyes widened and she became silent, her pallor going even paler than usual. One hand was over her mouth as the other was over her heart as she whispered disbelievingly, "Serephina?"

Serephina allowed a small, sad smile to appear on her face, despair shining in her eyes. "Walburga," she addressed back, almost as quietly.

I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I0I

"What's that?" asked Ginny. "What's that noise?"

"It's musical notes," Harry said with confusion. Where would musical notes be coming from in a house like Grimmauld Place? Remus frowned in concentration, listening for where the musical notes were originating from, but to no avail. All he could figure was that it was from one of the upper floors and not the ones the Order inhabits either.

Just as Hermione was opening her mouth to voice something, in came Sirius, who immediately froze at hearing the musical notes. He stood in shock for several moments, eyes wide and disbelieving, a soft smile just beginning to form on his lips.

"Sirius, what's that sound?" Inquired Hermione, never having heard any music played throughout Grimmauld Place besides from the Weasleys' wireless.

Sirius was just about to give an answer, when he suddenly grinned and said a vague, "Just follow me."

Everybody (Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Remus, Harry, Hermione, the Twins, and Ginny) followed Sirius up the stairs that had escaped their notice before. It led them up onto the Third Floor of Grimmauld Place, where the prevalent sounds of piano keys could be heard.

Not stopping, Sirius continued walking until he reached the end of the corridor and made a shushing and come hither gesture with his hand, before slowly and quietly twisting the door's brass handle and silently opening the door.

Everyone stood in awed silence a the scene they were greeted with: one Serephina Snape- well technically Black, their minds supplied. She was sitting on the piano bench, hands gracefully stretched out and fingers carefully taut as they were gracefully poised over the black and white piano keys, suffusing the room with a tranquility that was only matched by the peaceful serenity on the Potions Professor's face, eyes closed and breathing calm.

That silence was broken, however, not by the people standing by, but by Serephina herself.

**"It's not the pale moon, that excites me..."** she began to sing, eyes still closed.

**"That thrills and delights me, oh no, it's just the nearness of you..."**

Everybody couldn't make a sound if they wanted to. No one except for Sirius knew that Serephina Snape could play an instrument, let alone sing! As for Sirius, he didn't what to do either. He was glad that Seph was playing again, now she had another outlet, but he never thought that he would _ever _hear her sing again. Ever.

**"It isn't your sweet conversation...**

**that brings this sensation, oh no,**

**it's just the nearness of you"**

**"When your in my arms...**

**and I feel you, so close to me...**

**all my wildest dreams, came true"**

**"I need no soft lights, to enchant me**

**if you'll only grant me...**

**the right, to hold you ever so tight...**

**and to feel in the night...**

**the nearness of you."**

* * *

**(A.N.) ...And after months, this is all I have to show...so sad :( I literally have no idea when the next update of this will be, so don't expect anytime soon, my life is just way to hectic right now. As for my other stories...the same applies to them...thank you for reading. **


End file.
